Please pardon my overuse of swear words hshdhsh
---
Player: [is climbing up a cliff]
Player: Oh fuck. Oh no. Shit. We're almost out of stamina. Just a little more!
Player:
Player: Well fuck.
---
Everyone:
Paimon:
Paimon: Don't even think about eating me!
---
Unit: [standing idly]
No one:
Passerby checking unit out:
---
Lily: Papa toes
Player: ???
---
Cathedral nun: have you come to confess, my child?
Player: YES I COME TO CONFESS MY SINS, I'VE HAD LEWD THOUGHTS ABOUT THE KNIGHT OF FAVONIUS, KAEYA! HUHUHU
Cathedral nun: ....
Kaeya: Holy shit
Player: HAND HOLDING IS LEWD
---
Kaeya when the secret pirate treasure quest begins: We can't talk here we must go somewhere more private
Paimon: hMMM
Player: KXJDHDHFGHSHCOSKFJ
---
Kaeya: my father is pirate, I inherit eyepatch
MC:
MC: nice, people inherit eyepatches now...
---
Cathedral nun: Green is sus
Venti: I am Barbatos
Cathedral nun: Green is imposter
Venti: what
---
No one:
Dilus: The knights of Favonius suck. Taste my flaming sword you eyepatch noob.
---
Barbara climbing up cliff:
The angle:
Player: [gasp]
---
MC: I was sucked into this insane world.
MC: It has many weird creatures.
Paimon: But you're weird too-
MC: ....
MC: This place always makes me go what the fuck
---
Player picking a twin:
Player: [quickly chooses the girl]
Aether: :(
The unknown god: you are bound to me, male human.
---
Lisa:
MC: [exists]
Lisa: cutie.
MC: [blushes]
---
Player: aight here we go, boutta climb another cliff.
Lisa:
Player: No not you [switches unit]
---
Amber: I best in gliding you can't beat me (☞ ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)☞
MC: haha yes I can
Player: with me around, you're destined to lose (☞ﾟ∀ﾟ)☞
---
Player: Noelle hot
A different player: Noelle trash
A different player 2: aaaaAa bUT I NEED CLAYMORE FOR BREAK ROCK AND SHIEldS
Player: Noelle hot
---
Jean: this is making me anxious we better get our asses moving
Lisa: shush
Lisa: we have the power of ara ara on our side
---
No one:
Kaeya: ;)
Diluc: [gags]
Diluc: smh knights of FavOniUS
---
Xiangling: Paimon lives matter
Xiangling: When the Paimon is cooked
---
Granny Shan: I sell toys
Granny Shan: Adult toys too
Granny Shan: I meant toys that require adult supervision-
---
Player: Stay on track stay on track stay on track
Player: [explores the entire map]
---
YOU ARE READING
- Genshin Impact - Paimon is not emergency food
FanfictionFollow Paimon on her endeavor to avoid becoming the MC's emergency food. --- HEADCANONS, ONESHOTS, INCORRECTS, CRACKFICS (requests & ideas for any of them are well appreciated <3) Notice: Genshin Impact and the characters are all by MiHoYo !
