Behind Closed Doors // Billie Eilish

Chapter 48

"Okay." She kissed my cheek. "It's okay." She picked her phone up and started scrolling through Instagram.

I took the phone and straddled her. "I said I'm kind of scared. Not that I don't wanna do it." I cupped her face in my hands, kissing her.

She laughed and flipped us over, attaching her lips to my neck and setting her hands on my waist. A small moan escaped my mouth as she continues to suck on my neck. My face heated up out of embarrassment. That was a noise I'd never made before. She pulled my shirt off and set it on the bed.

I didn't necessarily feel comfortable with my shirt off. It wasn't that I thought she was gonna judge me because she was the one person that I knew wouldn't—it just didn't feel right. I felt like I should be trying to cover myself up right now.

She placed gentle kisses down the middle of my chest, her hands finding their way to the clasp of my bra. "Can I?"

I nodded and she undid the clasp, pulling my bra off and leaving my upper-half completely exposed to her. I still felt like I should've been covering myself up. What if she thought that I was fat, or my boobs were too small, or—I needed to stop. She wasn't.

She cupped my left breast in her hand and attached her mouth to my right, eliciting another small moan from me.

She smirked, moving down to my stomach after she was satisfied with the dark bruises she's left all over my chest. She untied my sweatpants and slowly pulled them down. It didn't require all that. She trailed kisses up and down my inner thighs, teasing me.

"Oh my God," I breathed. "Please fucking stop."

"Okay." She shrugged, sitting up.

I slid my hands into her hair, pulling her head back down. "Fuck you. You know what I meant."

"Be patient," she whispered with a smirk, palming me through my underwear. I sighed at the blissful feeling of the much-needed friction. She slid my underwear down and grabbed my knees, spreading my legs apart before positioning her head in between my thighs and placing her tongue on my clit. I pulled on her hair, causing her to moan against me, the vibration introducing a whole new, unbelievable feeling.

It was hard to believe that she'd never done that because fuck, she was good at it.

Her tongue swirled around in different ways, causing me to let out a quiet string of moans as a knot formed in my stomach. She reached her hand up and massages my left breast as her tongue moves in slow, circular motions. She moved her head back and blew, causing me to buck my hips up, wanting more. She took the hint and her tongue flicks over my clit quickly, and then she slows down for a minute before speeding up again. "Oh, fuck."

I pulled her head down, hoping she'd go faster. A wave of pleasure shot through me and a long string of moans and curse words escaped my mouth, my heart beating wildly as I reached my climax, all the tension leaving my body as it fell limp.

Billie laid beside me, pulling the blanket up over us which I was thankful for. She reached up and pushed some of my hair out of my face. "So?"

I raised my eyebrows, biting my lip. "Hm?"

She laughed a little. "I mean, I've never done that before. Was I trash? Was it fine? Do you regret it? Like, what are you thinking?"

"I definitely don't regret it." I laughed, not knowing what else to say without sounding too awkward.

"Good." She kissed my nose and then handed me my shirt. "Better put that shit on before Claudia and Finneas get home." She laughed, covering her mouth as she apparently just now remembers where exactly we are. "That's funny."

I shook my head at her, trying to close the clasp on my bra. I sighed heavily. "Can you help me?"

She laughed, closing the clasp on my bra. "You can't do it yourself?"

"As a matter of fact, no I cannot, Billie. I usually have to do it and then put it on."

"Wow. That's really something."

"Do not make fun of me, Eilish." I pulled my shirt on and braced my feet against the bed life my hips as I tugged my sweatpants on.

She raised her hands in surrender. "I'm not. Don't worry. One day, I will be there to help you with your bra every morning."

I rolled my eyes.

"Hey, you're rolling your eyes now but in a few years when we're living together—"

"Bold of you to assume we're gonna live together one day." I raised my eyebrows, jokingly. I didn't know what was gonna happen but I could see our relationship lasting for a while.

"We are. Trust me. I'll kidnap you if I need to."

The front door opened and muffled voices carried through the house. "We're home," Finneas yelled. Billie got up and I followed her out of the room and downstairs. "Are you guys hungry?" he asked.

Billie shook her head, a stupid smirk on her face. "Nope. I just ate, but Camilla might be."

That stupid asshole. My face heated up as I pursed my lips, nodding. "Yeah. I'm fucking starving because Billie," I looked over at her before continuing, "didn't offer to get me anything."

Finneas sighed. "Really? You won't even share with your own girlfriend? Damn. I'll make a pizza. I'm still kinda hungry too." He opened the freezer as Billie and I struggled to keep ourselves from laughing.

"What's funny?" Claudia raised her eyebrows.

"Your face." I grinned.

"I hate you."

I shrugged, sitting down on the couch next to Billie.

"I think no," Claudia said, wiggling herself into a spot between Billie and I. "We don't do any premarital touching, whatsoever."

"Well, you're touching me right now," I pointed out.

Billie groaned. "Get away from me, Claudia. I'd rather go home and get fucking shot through my window."

"Well, damn." She stood up and walked into the kitchen.

Billie turned to the side and laid her head in my lap. "Love you, Claudia," she yelled.

"You're lying!"

"I tried." She shrugged.

"Camilla," Claudia said tentatively after a few minutes.

"What?" Billie sat up and Claudia didn't answer. "Dude, what the fuck is it? You're scaring me."

Finneas looked over her shoulder and then quickly looked away. She dropped her phone, her hands visibly shaking.

"What the hell is wrong with you, Camilla," Finneas asked angrily. "That's sick!"

My heartbeat sped up as I looked between them confusedly. What did I do?