deja vu; karl jacobs

«addison»

tws listed in last chapters,
su1c1d3
s3lf-h4rm
anx1ety

PLEASE SKIP THIS CHAPTER IF THESE ARE VERY TRIGGERING. PLEASE!!!!!!!!!!! IT IS MOST LIKELY REALLY TRIGGERING PLEASE DO NOT READ THIS IF YOU CANNOT.

it's important to flesh out your side characters.

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i grabbed the cold door handle. i could feel the light drops of condensation from the indoor shower happening. the ponding of the water against the wall makes a beat that loops in my head.

why isn't addison answering

i feel the door again. knocking lightly against the pale wood. i twist the knob, and feel the slight click of the door opening. i push forward. i see my phone on the counter, but i also see addison. i go to put my hands up but then i see her thigh.

the skin was lightly raised, paler than the other, in long deep strips across her.

"addi," i softly whisper, "addi- come here," i hold out my arms. wrapping them around her half naked body. i feel her collapse into me. she was much taller than me. she always felt happier than me. but right now as her sobs shake my body, i rethink our whole life.

"deja, your—" she pauses to choke out a sob, "you're phone is- is on the counter," she lets go and points to karl sitting on my screen, completely confused on what's happening since i must have muted. i shake my head. and wave karl goodbye before hanging up.

"addison, please, do you want to talk about it," i continue in our embrace, but i lower us down to shut off the shower and sit her down on the side of the bathtub. she nods her head and hiccups.

"well- i," she continues to hiccup, her words coming out garbled, unclear, and confusing. i hold her. i feel her tears fall down my back. i hold her tight as possible. she finally lets go. i smile at her, her eyes red and bloodshot with tears.

"well- deja," she starts. she coughs a little awkwardly and laughs, "well it started when Nonna died. i thought it was my fault, it was a punishment you know. little irrational, but it was releasing some kind of pressure inside me. everytime i felt bad i just-" she makes a cutting motion across her thigh, "and yknow, it made me feel better," she chuckles lightly.

i look at her. i give my most understanding look. i hug her. she still cries into my shoulder.

"d-do you want to go to a-" she stopped me mid sentence and nodded. i smiled and held her while she continued to cry.

we walked to her room and then i paused. "do you want to run to target with me?" i smile at her and she smiles back. we walk out to the car, and i swipe and extra mask knowing she'd probably forget it. we get in the car and i let her pick the music. she puts on the poprocks station, with some hit from 2012 playing.

i lightly hit my hand to the beat and she smiles, her eyes still red. i smile over to her and she shoots one back. we quietly continue the ride and walk into target.

"hey look at this!" i whisper-yell to her, and show her a really cute teddy bear, with a small hole to hide things. i grab my phone and stuff it in there as she watches, lifting my brows. she laughs and nods, throwing it in the basket.

our basket contained some snacks, a few teddy bears, stationary, and some colored pencils. i see a pencil sharpener in there, and i quietly take it out. we walk over to the clothing isle and grab some stringless sweatpants, and a nice soft cordless hoodie. heading over to checkout, addison tries to grab her card to pay, but i swipe it out of the way, offering my money instead.

we sit quietly in the car as i drive addison down. the silence is comfortable, but there's som tension.

"i love you," i say quietly to her.

"i love you too," she says quietly back.

once we arrive we hug. i can feel the tears rolling down my cheeks as she checks in. i walk out to the car and drive home.

deja
deja_vu
addison (and i for a while) will be going on a break for personal reasons. i'm sorry about this, but please respect our privacy. we love you all <3
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short chapter
my text is weird how tf do i change this