{kagehina} he smelled like oranges

Chapter 22.

He woke up the next day with his head laying on Hinata's chest. It was a good way to wake up, because he could hear Hinata's heartbeat, which was very soothing. Hinata didn't seem to be up yet so Kageyama just lay there, petting Hinata's hair and listening to his steady breathing. After a few more minutes, Hinata awoke and yawned while looking down at Kageyama, "Good morning, beautiful."

"I'm not sure beautiful is the right descriptor for me," Kageyama chuckled.

"Well, I think it is," Hinata argued. He kissed Kageyama on the top of his head. Suddenly, Hinata clenched his teeth and put a hand to his head, "Ouch."

Kageyama sat bolt upright, "Are you okay?"

Hinata blinked, his face was contorted in pain and every word seemed like a struggle, "I... ow... oh my god... this hurts. Oh... now I feel... nauseous. This... isn't good."

Kageyama scrambled to get out of bed, "I'll go get a doctor."

Hinata grabbed Kageyama's shirt, "Wait... please... I don't think I have much time left. I'm already having trouble putting together thoughts. Even if they do perform surgery, I'll probably have permanent mental damage."

"What are you saying?" Kageyama asked.

"I'm asking you to stay with me. I want you to be the last person I talk to or see. If I get that, then that's enough of a happily ever after for me." Hinata began talking faster, "I love you so much, never change for anyone, you're already perfect." Kageyama could feel hot tears filling up his eyes and blurring his vision.

He blinked them away so he could see Hinata's face clearly, "Hinata, don't do this, let me get someone. Are you actually ready to die?"

Hinata grimaced in pain and kissed Kageyama, then closed his fingers around Kageyama's, "I'm not ready at all. I'm terrified, but you're here with me which is all that matters right now. Thank you, for staying by my side."

"Of course, I love you. I love you more than I've ever loved anyone," Kageyama told him.

Hinata tried to smile, "Don't forget me."

Kageyama held back more tears as he hugged Hinata and responded, "How could I?" As Kageyama finished saying this, Hinata's heart monitor went quiet.

Everything was a blur after that, Kageyama didn't move from Hinata's body until a Dr. Sakai came in a few hours later and saw him. There was a commotion, and Kageyama was moved gently, but he didn't remember most of it. He vaguely remembered being taken back home, but he didn't know who did it or when. He didn't know how much time had passed, he'd just collapsed on his bed and sobbed. He'd cried until no more tears came out of him, and even then, he sat there, shaking and gasping for breath. There was a stabbing pain in his chest and he had a dull headache. He couldn't accept it; it was all too much. Hinata was so young, this wasn't fair.

Kageyama decided to go take a shower, maybe being in the hot water for a while would help. He stepped into the bathroom on shaking legs and reached in to turn on the water, as he did, he noticed the orange shampoo bottle. He choked, and slipped. He landed hard on the floor of the shower. He had no will to move, so he just lay there, fully clothed, in severe pain, with cold water pouring over him. Kageyama didn't want to do anything without Hinata. He felt empty and worthless. The only person he cared about in the whole world was gone forever. He didn't want to exist. He hated everything about the world, especially himself. Kageyama would've been fine laying there for a few more hours, but he'd fallen on his hip and the pain was really getting to him.

At first, he just told himself he deserved it, but it seemed to get worse and eventually Kageyama couldn't stand it anymore. He made his way out of the shower, getting water all over the floor of the bathroom. He reached up and grabbed a bottle of pain meds from the medicine cabinet, and unscrewed the lid.