𝐬𝐰𝐞𝐞𝐭 𝐜𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐭𝐮𝐫𝐞𝐬 ↠ a. hotchner

chapter thirty-one - dna.

IT WAS past Jack's bedtime, and Ophelia had only noticed when she looked up from feeding Jude in the rocking chair. She sighed, and gazed down at Jude, who was fast asleep, still mindlessly nibbling on her bottle. She placed a gentle kiss on her nose and slowly lifted herself out of the chair, placing her baby in her crib directly next to it. She waltzed tiredly over to the lamp in the other corner of the room and turned the nob on the side, dimming it until the room was barely lit. She flipped the switch on the baby monitor and set off to Jack's room, where he would usually be playing. Instead, she found an empty room with toys strewn about on the floor. She smiled to herself, knowing where he must be. Directly across the apartment was the door to Aaron and Ophelia's room, where his desk now resided, since he no longer had an office to himself. Ophelia followed the sound of Jack's tiny giggles and Aaron's soft voice into their bedroom to see Jack sitting on his lap as he worked on the computer.
"Jack, baby," she called from the doorway. His eyes immediately met hers. "Time for bed." Aaron turned to face his son, his smile still lingering.
"Go with Mommy, I'll be there in a minute." Jack obeyed and took Ophelia's fingers in his hand.
"Let's get your toys picked up first, then we'll brush your teeth and get jammies on." He nodded.
"Can I put on my fish pajamas?"
"Of course, bug."

"So Matilda's strong young mind continued to grow, nurtured by the voices of all those authors who had sent their books out into the world like ships on the sea. These books gave Matilda a hopeful and comforting message: You are not alone." She closed the book and gave Jack a sly grin.
"Is that the end?"
"Right you are, bug." She placed the book on his nightstand and folded her hands in his lap. "Do you think you'll be ready for your test tomorrow?" He nodded and smiled.
"Okay." She ruffled his hair. "We'll go over the questions in the morning before school."
"Finished another book?" Aaron appeared in the door way, folding his arms proudly. Jack nodded with pride, making Ophelia smile.
"He's a champ," she praised. Aaron joined Ophelia at the side of the bed and let his arm drape around her.
"Time for bed, buddy," Aaron soothed as she rubbed brushed Jack's messy hair out of his face. He jutted his bottom lip out in protest.
"Can you sing the bedtime song, Mommy?" Ophelia chuckled.
"Bedtime song?" Aaron looked at her with prying confusion and interest.
"The one about Mother Mary," Jack elaborated. "Please," He droned out. Ophelia blushed.
"Fine, one time," she agreed. Aaron let out an adoring breath as she jokingly cleared her throat.
"When I find myself in times of trouble, mother Mary comes to me," she had to keep herself from laughing. "Speaking words of wisdom, let it be." Jack began to sing along.
"And in my hour of darkness, she is standing right in front of me," Aaron squeezed her shoulder, holding back the tears that threatened to fall. "Speaking words of wisdom, let it be." Jack continued on without her, instantly earning wide smiles from his parents.
"That's right, Jack," she cooed. "Let it be."
Aaron bid his son goodnight, and watched as Ophelia did the same.
"We love you, bug." She kissed his cheek and turned the nob on his lamp, letting all the light leave his room.
"I love you," he squeaked weakly, trying his hardest to stay awake. Ophelia followed Aaron through the doorway and into the hall, where he stopped in front of her.
"I'm in love with you," he breathed, as if he had been holding it in. She blushed as she closed the door behind her.
"I'm in love with you too." She stood on her toes to reach his lips, connecting them sweetly.
"When did you start singing to him?" Her arms lingered over his neck.
"He told me he saw his mom in a dream, and I said I knew a song about that," she explained, her smile slightly fading. "That's the first thing I thought to say." He still gazed down at her adoringly.
"It's perfect," he began. "You're perfect."
"I wish you'd stop saying that," she chuckled, blushing.
"It's true." He joined in on her laugher for a moment before leading her across the apartment, back to their bedroom.

      His smell filled her entire being as she breathed him in, nestling herself in his arms. She sighed contently and closed her eyes.
      "Baby?" She felt a pit of warmth grow in her stomach. She loved hearing him say that.
      "Hm," she hummed in response.
      "Have you ever considered," he paused, unsure if he should continue. He shifted his weight underneath her, causing her to meet his eyes. "I don't know," he stammered out. "Maybe looking for your parents?" Her expression went completely blank. He couldn't read her.
      "I don't know," she breathed. "Maybe?" Then, it clicked.
      "Did you look in my file to find my parents?"
      "No, no." He shook his head. "Well, yes, but that's the thing," he cleared his throat, as if he was trying to force his thoughts into words. "Your parents aren't named in your file." She faltered her brow in confusion. Of course, that was the entire point of leaving your baby at a fire station; to keep them hidden from you.
      "Yes, I know this," she sort of chuckled, looking for his point.
      "Ophelia," he began, swallowing hard on the lump in his throat. "You're filed as an orphan." She propped herself up on her hands to get a better look at him, scanning his face for answers.
"Excuse me?" That was all she could think to say; she was breathless.
"Ophelia," he started, but was cut off by her warmth leaving the bed as she threw the covers off of her.
"You just had to go looking in my file, didn't you?" She quickly stood, pacing over to the door of their bedroom.
"Ophelia," he called again, but she stopped him.
"I need some air." She ripped the door open, careful not to slam it behind her and wake up the children. She stomped into the living room and up to the front door, sliding on her thin cardigan that hung by the front door. She barely remembered to put on shoes before she left. Aaron knew better than to go after her.

Ophelia regretted only wearing a cardigan to go outside. Chilled wind burned her cheeks and made her eyes water, just enough that she could still see. The street was still busy; it was only nine. People passed her, bundled up with their coats and scarves, laughing and talking over the sound of the wind. Ophelia gave up trying to walk through the cold and sat down on a nearby bench. She stopped holding herself to pull out her phone, hitting the only contact she had on speedial.
"Please don't tell me I need to come in," Penelope's familiar voice pleaded through the phone. It almost made her smile, hearing the sound.
"No, I just need you to do some digging," she chuckled.
"Oooh, that sounds fun." She could hear Penelope's smile through the phone as she recognized the familiar sound of her light-speed typing. "Who are we digging on, my love?"
"Uh, me, actually," she breathed, her smile fading quickly after.
"That's a new one," Penelope joked. "What do you need to know about yourself?"
"I guess it's more about my parents," she admitted, looking down at her lap.
"Okay, I'm not seeing your parents anywhere in your file, hun." She quickly regretted her words. "Oh, that's why."
"I was hoping you could maybe, like—" Her throat felt like it was closing in on itself, and her eyes started to burn. "Take my DNA sample and match it with death curtificates or something?" She started to choke on her words and she covered her mouth, shoving down a sob.
"Of course, anything." She was frantically typing now, silently praying she could find something, anything.
"I've got a match with Georgia Jenkins and Keith Morales," she said finally, letting go of the breath she held in.
"Okay, tell me more," Ophelia prodded, wiping her cheeks.
"Uh, okay," she stuttered, searching worriedly. "It looks like your parents went to high school together, they got into some trouble with the local PD for vandalism— oh, god." Ophelia stayed silent, waiting for her to continue. "Um, your parents robbed a bank with two other people— they died from suicide by cop." Her words rang in Ophelia's ears, almost an echo of who her parents were.
"I'm so sorry—"
"No, that's okay." She wiped her silent tears away and pushed her hair out of her face. "That's all I needed. Thank you." She ended the call and looked out onto the street in front of her. Then, as if something has snapped inside of her, she began to cry. Alone, in the dark, the cold, in the street. She couldn't feel farther away from Aaron. Even though she was still holding on to her furious feelings, she needed him. All she wanted was to be held and loved by him. She never knew her parents, but something inside of her was deeply saddened by the knowledge of their passing. She knew they didn't want her; she had already been through the pain of that realization. But discovering their death— realizing they hadn't been out there somewhere all along was devistating. She truly had no one from her past or someone to connect to as family. No one to tell her about how in love her parents were, how much she was missed, or how they thought about her every day since they abandoned her. She was just alone. No past, no favorable memories to hold on to, no one to walk her down the isle or show her old pictures in a dusty scrap book from years ago. She had to make those things for herself and her family now. A fresh start. A sour, lonely, fresh start. She could only describe this feeling as one thing. Dead reckoning.