Oops! This image does not follow our content guidelines. To continue publishing, please remove it or upload a different image.
"grief is just love with no place to go"
~unknown
TODAY MARKED the two-year anniversary to Haley's death. There was no longer any trace of snow on the ground, and it was finally starting to warm up. The two were in the midst of planning their regular memorial event for her, which consisted of buying several lanterns and praying that they wouldn't get called on a case. Jack was growing up fast, too fast, Ophelia thought, and it was the first year that he truly understood the purpose of gathering around in the park and letting a bunch of lanterns fly into the atmosphere. It was Ophelia's turn to pick him up from soccer practice, coincidentally, and she was nervous. Not because she hadn't picked him up before, but because she was worried she would accidentally upset Jack. She hated to see him cry, just like his father. "Hi, Miss Ophelia," He greeted her, casual as ever. She celebrated inwardly as she watched him buckled himself. She really didn't know what to expect, but she really didn't want him to sob as soon as he got into her car. She had never truly lost someone, but then again, she never had anyone to lose. She just wanted him to be okay. "Hi, bug!" She shifted her rearview mirror so that she could see his face. "How was soccer?" "Just like always," He said matter-of-factly. She giggled, he was definitely growing up too fast. "What's daddy doing?" He asked, gazing out the window. Shew gulped. "He's getting ready for your mommy's memorial, remember? We're gonna release all those lanterns tonight," Her voice was gentle as she could muster, watching for any sign that he was about to cry. "Oh, yeah, I remember," His expression didn't shift, he didn't even look at her. She didn't know if that was a good or bad sign.
Back at Aaron's apartment, he was changing into his favorite polo shirt and jeans. All of his sad feelings had dissipated; today was a day to remember and be happy, and he only grew happier when Ophelia came home with his son. "We're home, Dad!" Ophelia called jokingly into the apartment as she closed the door behind Jack. He smiled to himself and walked out of his bedroom to see the two. "Hi, Daddy," Aaron groaned as he lifted his son onto his hip. "You're getting too big for this," He mused, smiling at Jack. "Or you're getting too old," He smiled sheepishly at his father. Aaron looked at Ophelia. "You're a bad influence," Jack giggled and she raised her hands up to say she had nothing to do with this. They all joined in on the laughter. "Are the lanterns in your trunk?" Ophelia sighed, her smile remaining. Aaron nodded and led them out the door, his son still attached to him.
It was now dark outside, the only light coming from the numerous street lamps and the moon above them. A crowd of people lined up, some Ophelia had never seen before and some familiar faces. Aaron handed them a lamp while Ophelia held onto Jack and set their lanterns alight with a small lighter. Spencer was the last to get a lantern and now it was Jack's turn. He watched Ophelia's gentle expression as she handed him a lantern and he knew it was not a sad thing to be remembering his mom that night. He held on tight to the paper, careful not to let it go too early. Ophelia was last to get her lantern. Aaron lightly draped his arm around her waist and they silently agreed. It was time to let her go once again. Aaron counted backwards from five and Ophelia looked out onto the crowd that stared at him, lying in wait. Suddenly, all of their lanterns began to rise into the air. Jack jumped to set his afloat and Ophelia giggled. His tiny hand grabbed onto hers and she looked down. He was just watching all of the lanterns float way. Her and Spencer shared a silent understanding. She was happy with him. She shifted her gaze lastly to the man that hung onto her. He was already looking down at her, like he often was. She drooped her head onto his shoulder and he kissed the top of her head. "Bye, Mommy," She heard Jack softly call out. His face still had no trace of grief. This reminded Ophelia of one of her many books in her miniature library. She recalled a quote she vaguely remembered. Grief is just love with no place to go. In her mind, she made a silent connection. Aaron and Jack no longer had grief for the loss of Haley. Maybe their love had a place to go, and maybe that was to Ophelia.
