*AUTHOR'S NOTE: This chapter contains a trigger warning for blood/loss/depression.
Bryce pushed the panic button inside the car that would alert the security office to send backup and notify your father that someone was under attack. You were bent over Chase, sobbing: “Baby, listen to me. Bryce is here and we’re going to get you help. Please be okay.”
You felt Bryce tugging at your arm but you just threw yourself on top of Chase’s trembling body. You were too traumatized to realize who was beside you and were intent on guarding his weak body with your own. Chase’s breathing sounded so labored and shallow but you couldn’t make out where the blood was coming from through the fog of your hysterical tears.
Bryce: “Listen to me. You are not going to be able to save him in the middle of the street. We have to get out of here and I’ll call 911.”
You: *jerking your arm away* “NO! Don’t touch me! I’m not leaving him! Do you hear me baby, we’re calling for help and I’m not leaving you so you don’t get to leave me!”
Bryce took a call that’s obviously your father judging from the screams you heard coming through the phone that’s was not even on speaker phone: “How tf did she get out of this house again? Do I have a security team or teenage babysitters?!”
Bryce: “She had to slip out the back in our blind spot, sir but she’s okay. The boyfriend isn’t looking good but 911 is on the way.”
Dad: “You have to get her out of there before the police show up. We don’t need that kind of attention. I sent another one of my guys to watch from a distance and make sure he makes it to the hospital.”
You noticed Chase’s breathing slowing but it sounded so shallow. He couldn’t speak, so the only signs of life were the tears streaming from his eyes as his motionless body started to give up. Bryce hung up and again started trying to pull you away from Chase.
You: “NO! NO! NO! I’m not leaving him.”
Bryce picked you up while you kicked and screamed: “Chase!! Noooooo! I love you. Please, baby. I love you! Please be okay. Please I need you to be okay!”
Bryce shut you in the backseat and master-locked the doors so you couldn’t jump back out. He hopped in the front and took off towards the house as you saw ambulances fly up the hill past you.
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You: *barely able to eek out a whisper* “I will never forgive you for this, Bryce.”
You knew he heard you because he was making direct eye contact in the rearview mirror with your swollen, tear-stained eyes and then swiftly looked down in heartbreak.
You didn’t know how long you’d been laying across your bed, but the fact that the sun was starting to peek in through your curtains hinted at a few hours. At that point it could have been days, as foggy as your head felt. You’d been in a trance since you were shoved in the back seat of the car outside of the skatepark and inspite of your bloodshot eyes and tear-stained cheeks, you hadn’t been able to cry in hours. It’s not that you weren’t able to feel, inside your head was screaming so loud you could feel a headache getting increasingly worse. From the outside, however, you were a numbed shell of a person.
Your sister and mom had come in to check on you a few times but when they got no response, they would leave you alone. When you saw your dad’s head peek in, though, you jumped. Any hope that pulled you to sitting was crushed when you saw the look on his face: “No. No, no, no. Don’t you say it.”
Dad: “Princess, I’m so sorry.”
You screamed out a deep wail that came straight from your gut as he continued: “I had Blake follow him to the hospital pretending to be a jogger who found him, but he was pronounced dead on arrival.”
His heart broke for you and he really was trying to help as he offered: “His mother thinks it was a mugging and I offered to pay any expenses she has. What else can I do?”
You: *a whisper so low it almost sounded like a growl* “GET OUT!!!”
Dad: “Dixie!!”
Dixie slid in past him and curled up next to you. She wrapped her arms around you as your body shook from sobbing. Your dad left you two alone because he knew what you were trying to ignore; that Dixie had been your first best friend and even though you had very little in common anymore, you loved each other fiercely.
Dixie: “Shh… shh… I know you loved him so much.”
Charli: *whimpering* “I can’t do this without him. He was it for me.”
Dixie: “Char, I’m so sorry.”
You refused to talk to anyone for the next week. You’d messaged Avani to check on Chase’s mom a few times, but other than that you stuck with the ‘don’t want to talk’ message. You’d refused to speak to your dad at all and only gave your mom a small smile when she brought you food that morning. Bryce had kept his distance but his services weren’t really necessary with you not leaving your room, much less the house. Today was different, today you had to go say the goodbye that you weren’t ready to say. You’d never be ready to say. He respected you weren’t ready to forgive him yet, but deep down you knew eventually you’d have to. He’d only been following orders. The real person to blame was your father and the world he’d brought you all into.
You hugged his sobbing mother throughout the service and thought about how she was possibly going to carry on. She’d been a single mother his entire life and it’d only been the two of them since day 1. His 2 best friends, Nick & Ryland shared memories of happier times that seemed to comfort his mom, but only broke you more as you were reminded of just how much life he should have had left… life with you.
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His mom had asked you to say a few words but as you stood at the podium you couldn't manage to exhale much less speak. Your dad took a step towards you buy froze when he saw it was making things worse. Noah pushed his way through the crowd and wrapped his arm around you as Dixie clutched her heart in appreciation for what an amazing man she'd found. He took the scribbled paper you'd written at 4am and began to read your words while squeezing you tightly.
You were mostly numb to the day, but when you watched the beautiful onyx box with delicate gold inlay lower into the ground you felt your heart ripped from your chest and imagined all the broken little pieces scattering around him.
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