just like me || remus lupin

hi griff.

1993:

"Merlin. That was—,"

"Intense?" Remus chuckled as Harry slowly ate a piece of chocolate. Harry nodded. Remus was teaching Harry how to cast a patronus spell and after Harry's many failed attempts, they took a break. That's when Harry finally got Remus to tell him who Cerise was. Remus had left out the parts about Sirius, of course, since he knew the boy would go ballistic.

"I wish I had gotten to know her. She seemed like a very prominent person in my mum and dad's lives," Harry confessed.

Remus sighed. "Indeed. Not just your parents, but many others as well. The Weasleys also deeply cared for her. That's why your dear friend Ginny's middle name is Cerise."

"That makes sense," Harry said nibbling on his piece of chocolate. They both sat in silence as Remus walked around the room.

"Would you like to attempt one more, Harry?" Remus asked. Harry hesitated, but nodded. He got up and wiped his slightly stained hands onto his clothes before grabbing his wand. Remus stood behind the large chest ready to open it.

"Wait!" Harry announced to his professor. Remus let go of the chest and stood up. "Sorry if this is too personal, b-but what do you imagine when you cast your patronus?"

Remus warmly smiled. "Well, her, of course."

Harry pondered over his thoughts and slowly nodded before getting into a ready position. Remus then grabbed the top of the chest and opened it, letting the Dementor out.

———— ᕦ(ò_óˇ)ᕤ ————

Remus walked through the halls, reminiscing on his time at Hogwarts when he was still a student. Multiple students politely greeted their professor as he walked by.

It was a strange feeling. Being a professor at a school he once used to torment relentlessly with his old pals. Being a nuisance to McGonagall. Now they were coworkers.

Once the hallway cleared out he walked further down. That's when he noticed an oddly placed painting in the middle of the hallway. There weren't many paintings around so this particular one stood out greatly.

He remembered what Sirius and Peter had said to him in their sixth year. He hated remembering Sirius. Especially what he had done to his loved ones. To Peter, James, Lily, and Cerise.

It was a sad sight indeed. What a poor soul. The kind and rowdy kid he once was, had vanished from existence. It left his body the second his friends and lover left this earth.

Out of all of his friends and family, he was the one who hated life the most. He was the one who didn't want to live. Now, he's one of the few still standing alive and breathing. Irony is a bitch indeed.

He stepped closer to the painting and softly chuckled.

It was him, the Marauders, Lily, Rosie, and Cerise all on a couch clustered together in a drunken mess.

James and Lily stood behind the couch making goofy faces, Sirius sat on the edge of the couch with his tie untied around his neck while holding a cup of beer, Peter was grinning widely while Rosie sat on his lap, and Cerise sat on the other side of the couch laughing with a very drunk Remus leaning on her legs. As the painting began to move, he cringed at his past behavior. While everyone talked to one another, his eyes wouldn't move off of Cerise. Cerise was laughing, making sure that Rosie didn't fall off the couch. She then turned to Remus. It slightly frightened him, before she happily waved at him.

Remus looked around, wondering if he was going crazy. It wouldn't have been the first time, after all. While the rest of the friends continued talking to one another, Cerise was the only one who acknowledged his presence. He slowly waved back, which made the girl smile.

"Well, damn," he chuckled. "Hi, Griff." She smiled at him. "It's crazy to believe that out of the seven of us in this photo, three of us are still left standing."

Cerise turned to each of the friends before tilting her head in confusion. He sighed as he remembered she was just an image in a painting.

"I miss you every day. If you could see me now, you'd be so proud of me," he explained to the painting. Cerise nodded slowly. "I loved you, that bits true. And sometimes I feel like I still do. I think a part of me always will."

Cerise clenched her heart before gagging at his words. He let out a genuine laugh.

"I wonder what your last words were. You're last breath. I sometimes wonder if your last thoughts were of me. A part of me wishes they were. I know mine will be of you."

"Shouldn't you be in class—," a female voice called out from behind Remus. He quickly turned around. The girl covered her mouth, "Oh! My apologies. I thought you were a student talking to someone."

She was a very attractive girl. She had bright pink hair and he could sense a tough attitude from her.

"Pardon, I-I was just—," he stammered as he pointed to the painting. Cerise was no longer looking at him but instead was back to laughing at talking with her friends. He chuckled, "I was just talking to myself." The girl smiled weirdly before walking next to him.

"Is that you?" She pointed to the boy with scars that was admiring Cerise a little too much.

"Yeah," he awkwardly laughed. "Back when I was still a student here. Around 1977."

"You look like a fun group of kids," she mentioned.

He nodded. "Yeah, we were." He turned back to the girl and cleared his throat, "I'm not trying to seem rude, but do I know you?"

The girl chuckled, "No, I don't think so. I work for the Ministry as an Auror. I just stop by the school from time to time." She offered her hand out to Remus. "The name's Nymphadora Tonks. But please, never call me Nymphadora. Tonks is fine." Remus nodded before gladly shaking the girl's hand.

"Pleasure to meet you. I'm Remus Lupin."