42- Grief

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Grief

"Grief is just love with no place to go"
- Jamie Anderson

"Grief is just love with no place to go"                                                  - Jamie Anderson

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Blossom's POV

It's been 4 days, and Sin still hasn't woke up
It felt like someone was physically trying to rip my heart out, everyday I'd sit here, staring at him and holding his hand.
Willing him to open his eyes, to smile at me.

To squeeze my hand back.

I felt so lost... so broken
Acacia was gone... Warren and Mags were arranging her funeral, but I couldn't bare to take part in it, I wanted it to be perfect, and I know if they asked me for any ideas I would only break down.

It was better to leave it to them
The only thing I would like them to do is to get Acacia flowers.
Mum always loved flowers.
It's where Acacia got her name from.

They were flowers that represented beauty and the purity of a soul, just like her
And at... at funerals... they meant rebirth. Immortality
I always hoped my sister would outlive me, what sibling wouldn't?

But she was gone... so all I can do now is let her live on in my memories. In my heart.
There were so many losses, so many ties broken
Every time I thought of Acacia I'd break down, every time Micah flashed in my mind I felt my heart ache.

Raven, Micah, Acacia... even Narissa and Lincoln
There was just so much... carnage. Pain.

It needed to stop.

"Blossy darling, please just eat something" Sophie urged, I shook my head, my gaze fixed on Sin
I didn't want to eat, I couldn't
I couldn't sleep, I could barely think
I just wanted him to be okay. I needed him.

I heard Sophie sigh, before she walked back over to Alexander, sitting opposite me.
They would come in most days, but they weren't always here
So I had to be. He couldn't be alone
Someone needed to be here when he woke up
I needed to be here for him.

And I didn't blame them for not being here everyday, they were dealing with the fallout of the attack, the pack leaders all frantic and worried from their grievances
And... Raven.

Her funeral would be next week. And it was clear Alexander wasn't coping very well with his loss.
I missed her too, even if she claimed she didn't like me. Maybe she really didn't
But I liked her. She was strong and outspoken.

She was the kinda girl I wished I was sometimes
Not afraid of what others think. Says it how it is.

I leant forward, bringing his hand up to my lips, I felt the tears ready to fall again
Every time I thought I had no more to cry, they would just resurface, and I'd watch Sophie look at me with such sadness and pity
I didn't want pity
I wanted my Sin.

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