Collide ↠ Asher Adams

twelve

There was no doubt in my mind that I had to explain myself to Bennett. He doesn't deserve being lied to.

I've been replaying what happened at the dance all night long. I've barely slept because every time I close my eyes, my mind floods with the feeling of Asher's lips on mine. His hands trailing down my arms, how soft his hair felt in between my fingers.

But then my brain switches to a new scene. Being absolutely humiliated in front of the entire school with Asher's cold blood shot eyes burning into my own.

Then it switches to crying into Bennett's chest, no doubt getting makeup on his suit as he rubbed my back soothingly.

It gives me a headache just thinking about it but I can't seem to shake the feeling I got when I looked into Asher's hurt filled eyes. That was what haunted me the most.

I've come to the conclusion that I need to put some distance between Asher and I. I mean it's for the best if I want things to work out between me and Bennett.

Which is how I found myself sitting alone on a park bench waiting for Bennett.

I called him early this morning when I realized I wouldn't be falling back asleep anytime soon and I knew he would be awake seeing as he gets up early to train. Shockingly, he agreed to come meet me with having to beg him.

I can't help but feel like this might blow up in my face. I mean I wouldn't blame him if he came here just to say that he never wanted to see me again.

"Penny for your thoughts?"

I turn to see Bennett sitting down next to me on the bench.

"These thoughts aren't even worth a penny."

His eyes crinkle in the corners as he throws his head back laughing.

His smile. I could never get tired of seeing his smile.

I sigh as I think about last night.

"I'm sorry." I say quietly as I look down at my hands.

He grabs my own hand in his making me turn to him.

"You know you crack your knuckles when you're nervous." He says not looking away from our hands.

I look down to see that I was in fact cracking my knuckles. I guess I never noticed before.

"Why are you being so nice to me?" I ask as I pull my hands away as the guilt crawls up my spine. "If I were you I wouldn't even be talking to me."

"Well if I'm being honest I was going to tell you to piss off."

My head snaps over to look at him as my mouth drops. But I immediately close it when I see his smirking face.

He playfully pushes me as he laughs, "I'm joking. I would never say something like that to you."

I put my head in my hands as I face the ground. "See that's what I don't understand. I don't understand why you're not furious with me. Yelling at me to leave you alone."

"Nobody's perfect, we all have our faults."

"But you're perfect!" I yell as I lift my head to look at him. "You've been nothing but sweet to me since the day we met." I thought I was seeing things when I saw his smile slightly falter at my words because as quick as it happened his smile was back on his face.

"And then I go and embarrass you in front of the entire school."

"Carter you didn't embarrass me. Everybody makes mistakes, that's what makes us human. I don't blame you for that." He says comfortingly.

I don't understand.

I don't understand at all.

This was supposed to make my headache go away not increase it by ten.

"I don't deserve you." I shake my head ashamed.
He lifts my chin up gently forcing me to lock eyes with him. I dart my eyes back and forth between his, losing myself in the pools of chocolate.

"You deserve the world." he says quietly.

The air around us grew thick as we stared into each others eyes daring the other to make the first move.

I saw his eyes flicker down to my lips and then back up. He leaned in to where his lips were just barely brushing mine.

His eyes fluttered close as he waited for me to close the gap. To decide if this was what I wanted. He put the ball in my court and gave me all the power in this situation.

This was my chance to decide if this was what I really wanted to happen.

If I close the gap then that's me saying that I want whatever is to come.

Well, that's how I see it anyway. In my head this is it. If I do this then I am committing to Bennett. There's no more back and forth, he doesn't deserve that.

I decide to take that final jump off the cliff and thow myself in the deep end.

I close the space between us and gently place my lips on his.

I don't know what I was expecting.

This kiss was slow and innocent, almost like he didn't want to push my limits, like he didn't want to scare me off.

It was a comforting sensation as his hands cupped my face.

He was the first to pull away but kept his hands on my face holding me in place.

I opened my eyes to find him looking at me intently, like he was studying me.

He sighed as he finally connected his eyes to mine. There was an emotion in them that I couldn't seem to detect.

His voice was timid as he leaned his forehead onto mine, "I like you more than I expected."

Deep down I know what I was expecting. I know what I was subconsiously comparing him to.

No matter how much I wanted to deny it I was comparing him to Asher.

It always comes down to Asher.

A/n

Hey guys! I'm sorry that this is a short chapter I just wanted to focus a little on Bennett and Carter's relationship.

But in all seriousness I can't believe this book has 18k reads that is insane. Thank you so much for all of the support you guys have shown it means the absolute world to me. Reading y'all's comments is probably the highlight of my day you guys are so funny.

Let me know if you are Team Bennett or Team Asher.

-Kenzie