The Lost Teller

Broken

  We arrived at St.Thomas Hospital in less then 15minutes we walked off the elevator and right away I saw Jax light up when his eyes met some cute brunette doctor. "Who is she?" I asked smirking at his lacking poker face. "And old friend and Abels doc." He smiled I nodded "just a friend? Dude you look like some love sick little puppy. You poker face sucks dick." I laughed and walked over to her and leaned agasint the counter of the med desk. " hello, you don't know me, but you do know my new idiot brother. He likes you just an FYI. Have a nice day!" I whispered to her fast and walked away back to Jax as he looked at me horrified "what did you just say?!" He asked worried as we looked over at Tara who was flushed and slightly laughing looking at us. Once composed she walked over to us. "Jax here to see Abel? He's doing really well today. Now who are you?" She asked turning to me at the last part. I just smiled. "No one of importance doc, I won't be around long with my luck so I wouldn't worry about it." Saying that Jax looked slightly hurt and alittle annoyed by me saying that. "Her names Dakota, I told you about her, Johns lost child. She's already proving to be a pain in my side." He playful glared as he said the last bit. Ignoring my statement of being no one important. I just rolled my eyes "yeah yeah, can we see this kid already." I asked getting alittle excited again which changed his mood too as he smiled and Tara laughed and motioned us to follow to this room with a bunch of incubators for infants. We walked over to one that had a small little boy who was staring up at us and had the same bright blue eyes as his father and myself. "Well it's safe to say good looks run in the teller bloodline." I laughed rolling my eyes still staring at the sweet little boy. "Dude he's gonna break some many damn hearts. Good luck with that." I laughed out again just making Jax smirk. "He's a cute kid right?" Tara asked smiling at us while also looking the little boy in-front of us. I just nodded. "How much longer until he can get outta this toaster?" Jax asked Tara. "The head doctor said maybe another week then he will go to the nursery for another 2 and probably home after that. So not much longer." She smiled. Jax nodded. She walked out to give us privacy. "You know this isn't some temporary foster home right? This is for good kid. You arent going anywhere. You can knock down some of those walls you have built so high." Jax spoke up again after Tara left leaning against the wall looking at me now. I shrugged. "I've heard that before Jax. So to actually believe it is something that will probably never happen. You have only known me for like 6 hours? And you clearly did shit job of looking into my files and my history. I'm just a problem. I'm never gonna be able to fit into your life, or the guys or even this little dudes. I'm too broken. You would be smarter to let the state send me off to god knows where to never be thought about again before I end up being more a burden than you are ready for, besides you have a son you need to worry about." I answered back as honestly as I could trying to hide the few tears that did slip down my face, because it was true it's all I've ever been told my whole life, that I was a problem. A broken record that no one would want. A burden. "You seriously think that. Kid I'm sorry for whatever you have been through and whatever bullshit people have feeding you all these years but it is not true. And besides do you really think I'm not messed up and broken in my own ways? Hell everyone in this family and club have there own fucked up issues. Just makes us human. Like I said. You aren't going anywhere. You don't have to believe it right now but it's true. You're stuck with us whether you like it or not. You have a real family as of now. You are my blood. You're my little sister and I might not have been able to help you the last 16 years but I can now. No one in this family will turn there backs on you, and I sure as hell won't. If anyone else does they have me to deal with." He tried to reassure me but it just broke me more. I wanted to believe it but they don't have a clue how screwed up I am. I was still lightly crying. As he walked back over. I tried to play it off but failing miserably as more tears just kept falling like the pathetic girl I am. He just stayed quiet and looked at Abel which I appreciate more then anything in the moment. He wrapped his arm around my shoulder and smiled "common I'm sure gem has a whole buffet of food waiting for us." He laughed and walked us to the door. I just nodded laughing lightly wiping my eyes and walked out with him waving goodbye to the sweet little boy in the box. I want nothing more than to believe what he said.. but I don't know how too.