I Always Smile, But Is It Always Real?✅

part 28

Minho played with the cat for a lot of time. He was feeling happy and bubbly. Not even a bit uncertain, but he knew that they were not real.

He knew that all these things were mere distractions. He knew that he had to overcome his fear to feel real happiness but he wasn't ready to face his fear.

Minho skipped on his way to home while humming a random s song.

"That cat was sooooo cute"said Minho while giggling.

He finally reached his house. He still felt uneasy but he just decided to ignore it. He opened the door and went to his room.

He saw his bag lying in a corner.

"Do I really have to study now?" Asked Minho.

He bit his lip out of nervousness. He was worried that he would not be able to solve the sums.

"No no atleast I need to give it a try" he walked up to his bag and opened it.

He reached out for his book. He couldn't find his literature book. He forgot it at school. He sighed. He wanted to do literature because that was the only thing he was a little bit confident in.

He searched for something else but nothing was there. Except a physics book.

The subject he hated the most, even the teacher. Their physics syllabus was really difficult. He couldn't remember a single day when he didn't cry while solving his physics homework.

He grabbed his book and opened it. He started feeling really anxious so he started humming a song to calm himself a little bit. He gulped  down his saliva and grabbed the pencil and started solving the problem.

You can't do anything.

You are incapable of studying.

You are good for nothing, you pathetic shit.

Rhino's words resonated in his head. He pushed away all those thoughts and decided to focus on the problem. He wanted to prove Rhino wrong.

He was not even half way the problem and he was aldready panicking.

What if I won't be able to solve it?
Calm down and just try it!

He tried and failed to even understand the problem. His eyes started getting teary. He felt angry with himself.

He closed the book and took a deep breath. He kept on reminding himself to try again and not give up .

"Ok, let's do it" he re opened the book and started solving them. He didn't get the problem so he tried the other one.

Tears started falling from his eyes. He still didn't give up and kept on trying. He tried the same problem once.

He didn't get.

This times even more tears fell.

He tried thrice.

He didn't get.

With each try his sobs and tears would increase. He skipped the sum and went to another one. But he couldn't get a single thing.

He threw tha book away and started sobbing heavily.

"Why? Why am I good for nothing?" He tightened his grip on the pencil in his hand as he started crying even more.

He was really upset. The uneasiness and suffocation he was feeling the whole time he started feeling it again.

"Why? Why can't I prove you wrong Rhino? Why are you always right!?" He screamed.

He began shaking. Before he could react even more his phone rang.