Listen before I go

Chapter 5; A little fun

There was silence for a while. I had started to think I took my suicidal jokes too far. Maybe it's scaring him now? I was getting worried for some reason. It seems like Cole is the only person who was completely honest with me and even though I barely knew him,his presence was growing on me and I'd hate to scare him off. It's always like this with me,I make a friend,we have fun and when I start to get serious,I lose the 'friend'.

"Okay we can compromise" he said after what seemed like ages of silence!. I felt relieved when he spoke,even more relieved when I could still sense the goofiness in his voice. " You can stay home,if you like,or you can come and hang out with me and my girlfriend." .
"Seriously?!" I asked
"Yeah. Why?" He replied.
"Oh nothing,it's just,I've been stuck here for sometime and you're supposed to make sure I stay in here but here you are offering to take me out, risking your job?! That's too much" I said.
"Well,if you don't tell,I'd still have my job" he replied.
"Okay. But I hate to break it to you,I'm not really sociable,I get panic attacks around people,social anxiety,it's part of the reasons why i stay indoors"
"Whatever" he said with a teasing face. " So we have a deal or not?!" He inquired.
"Deal." I said.

So for the next few days and even weeks,I skipped my therapy sessions and stayed at home and enjoyed my peace of mind. The nightmares and panic attacks  still came but  not as often and as terrifying as they used to. Mrs Jean gave him a watch that had a recorder in it. They thought I didn't know but I knew. It recorded every conversation we had and he sent it to Mrs Jean so they could analyse my progress. Still,I chose to trust Cole,at least a little bit. One day I decided I wanted to go out and have fun too,for once. I promised him I wouldn't have social anxiety and run away nor would I have a panic attack but I'd try to blend in.

"So my girlfriend,Tina and I are going to the movies,care to join?" He offered.
"Well of course." I replied, overjoyed at being offered the chance to go out and breath real air again!.

I went inside my room to get ready. I splashed some water on my body,dried myself and went back in to dress up. I wore sweatpants and a sweater. I took off my scarf to expose my hair; dyed green from the roots to the middle of its length and black from the middle to the end of it. I wore a pair of Sneakers and came out!.

"Whoa!" Cole exclaimed.
"Yeah. I know,I dress like a boy sometimes,well most of the time" I rolled my eyes.
"That's cool. It suits you. You're looking great actually." He said.
"Whatever" I replied.

So we drive through town until we got to the movies. Cole took the long road although so that I could take nice look at town before we got to the cinema where his girlfriend,Tina was waiting for us. We didn't say much during the drive. He may have said a few words but I didn't say anything back. Mood swings,you know.

"Hey T" Cole called out to his girlfriend. Looking at her, I'd say she and Cole looked a whole lot like eachother!.
We went into the cinema and we took our seats. Cole and Tina sat on the last row and I went forward to sit a few rows in front of them since there were no more places left to sit at the back.

A gentleman probably a few years older than me came to sit by me.
"Hi,my Reginald" he said and stretched his hand.
"Okay" I said as I gave him the kind of look  that said 'don't talk to me'.

We watched 'Five feet apart' which was basically an emotional love story. Watching it opened up some parts of me that I thought I'd lost. Reginald kept trying to speak to me every chance he got during the movie for some reason. I ignored him until his words finally caught my attention.

"It's funny how people manage to fall in love in so many strange ways, wouldn't you agree?" He asked.
"Yeah. It's also funny how some never find love at all" I said.
"So you don't believe in love?" He asked
"I can't really say,I haven't experienced anything of that sort ever so I can't tell" I said dryly.
"Hm. Would you care to explain,?" He asked.

Throughout the rest of the  evening,he and I had some nice discussions. He seemed to always know what to say and what to ask. It was like he was trained at communication. Strangely enough,his questions caused me to realise things I never thought I even felt. When the movie was over,Cole wanted to drop Tina off at home so I waited. Reginald was waiting for someone too so we spoke more. Cole arrived an hour later!. He came to me, apologizing but surprisingly,I wasn't annoyed at all,instead,I was actually happy. The conversation I had with  Reginald was soothing.

He gave me his card as he was leaving,which I accepted. Cole teased me about it to which I retaliated by teasing him with Tina.

Mrs Jean was at home when we got there.
"Mrs Jean?" I asked when I saw her.
"Oh hello Billie,hi Cole" she said and looked at both of us.
"So how did the therapy at the cinema go?" She asked.
"What do you mean?" I asked her.
"Cole said you needed a change of scenery so I had a therapist see you at the cinema. Mr Reginald Patel. Did you see him?" She asked.
"What?! Reginald was a therapist?" I asked, shocked.

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It's not a must but we should try to make the people around us feel comfortable around us!. It could be walking with them to school or to class,a shared snack it could be anything. Making people feel intimidated around us will not help either of us!. It could lead to some serious overthinking on the receiver's part and it could lead to something dreadful. We must be hospitable!

Nketia💕