Listen before I go

Chapter 8; Emotions,purpose.

Hey peps, thanks for coming this far with me. You might want to listen to Lovers by Anna of the north💕.

"Cole! Where have you been?! I've been calling you. Didn't you see my texts? And why were you banging the door like that? You scared me!" I scolded him.
"Oh spare me the righteous lecture Billie! I could really not use it right now. All you ever think about is yourself! Kill yourself for all I care"

I was shocked! What was happening to him?!.

"Cole?" I got closer and then I caught the strong scent of alcohol around him. "Oh my God,are you drunk?! How much did you drink?!" I drew closer to help him into one of the arm chairs.
"Get away from me you selfish woman. What did you say yesterday? You said I don't know how it feels to be alone! Ha! Very funny! You have no idea what-" that was all he said and he fell from the chair.

I was getting worried,was he dead? Was he unconscious? I had no idea. But I was scared. So I called Mrs Jean for help.

"Hey Bill,what's up" she said over the phone.
"No time for pleasantries. I need your help!" I went straight to the point.
"Okay. What's wrong?" she asked
"It's Cole! He came back drunk and he passed out while he was talking,I'm scared. Is he dead?" I asked her.
"No I'm not sure he's dead. Just turn him to lie on his side so that she doesn't choke on his own fluids. You can take off some of his clothes and maybe splash some water on him to maintain his body temperature." She instructed.
"Oh thank goodness!. Thank you Mrs Jean! Bye!" I said.
"You're welcome but oh and Billie?" She said.
"Yes?" I asked.
"It's not my place to say because apparently he hasn't told you but I think you deserve to know" she said.
"What are you talking about?" I asked.
"You know Tina,that girl he hangs out with so much?" She asked.
"Yes ,his girlfriend" I responded.
"See, that's the thing,Tina is not Cole's girlfriend,she's his twin sister" Mrs Jean said.
"What?!" I exclaimed.
"Yes and she was diagnosed a disease  while ago. She had very little time left to live. Cole took up this job to earn enough money to pay for her treatments and needs to insure that the little time Tina had left would be less painful. When the doctors said she had at least a month left to live,Cole did everything he could to make the one month Tina had left memorable." Mrs Jean said with a sigh.
"So that's why he was always eager to hang out with her" I said as everything suddenly begun to dawn on me. Then it made sense why he called me Selfish. I was worrying him with my problems when he was going through a tough patch himself.
"I don't know how the relationship is between you two but I only hope you help him find some comfort. Don't be too hard on him. He cares about you" Mrs Jean said. "I'll take my leave now".

I walked Mrs Jean to the door and then I rushed back in. Cole was lying down in one of the arm chairs. His head was hanging over the arm rest and it looked like he was difficulty breathing.I knew if I didn't do something then,he could choke on his own fluids and die. I rushed to him and turned him over to his side. He vomited and that's how I knew he had had too much to drink. He kept muttering something under his breath but o couldn't make out what he was trying to say. I thought of what to do for a while and then decided I'd be a good friend and take care of him till he regained consciousness.

I helped him get up even though still subconscious. I walked him to the bathroom. I pushed him into the bathroom then I undressed him. I took off him shirt and his shorts and anything else he was wearing till he had only his underwear left; a singlet and boxer shorts. I opened the shower and let it wash him while I held him stable under the shower. I got wet too but at that moment I don't mind. I only cared about helping him. I let the cold water wash him for thirty minutes straight ,he would open his eyes sometimes and then close them again during the shower. When I felt like he had had enough,I led him out of the shower. In the bedroom,I dried him off with my towel and he fell right on the bed. I coveted him with a huge blanket and I let his rest. I, however,slept on the couch.
That night as I slept in the couch,I stared at the ceiling and I let my thoughts loose. I wondered how hard it must have been for Cole to keep his pain bottled up this whole time while I just kept whining about my problems. I realised how selfish I actually have been,not just to Cole but to everyone who has ever been in my life. I said a secret apology to all of them. Normally,I would get overwhelmed by my thoughts and feelings so much that I would harm myself but tonight I kept my thoughts under control,I had to. I decided to help Cole however I could and helping him does not include harming myself.

______________________
We never know what's going on in other people's lives. The person who seems to be perfectly fine may not be fine but there's no way we'd know if they don't open themselves up for us. The one thing that we can do however is to be nice to the people around us. It'll be selfish to think we're the only ones with issues. Take Cole for example.
****
Purpose. It's one of the little things that aren't so little. Sometimes people feel worthless and useless when they think they have no purpose. That feeling of emptiness can make people go to extreme measures to find closure. Sometimes all that depressed people need is a reason not to be depressed. We can't always give them that,but we can try to be the kind of friends they would be strong for. Now, Billie has found purpose, friendship.

Nketia💕