Red Vs Blue, & there's Magenta: Season Four

Chapter 15 Getting Debriefed

Grif: You. . . wanted to see me, Sarge?

Sarge: Yes Grif, I think it's time we buried the hatchet and started working more closely together.

The two were within the Red Base.

Grif: Say what? Isn't that a sign of the apocalypse or something?

Sarge: As you know, I've never liked you. Not even a little bit.

Grif: *blinks* Really?

Sarge: You've always been lazy, insubordinate and I suspect that underneath that helmet you're probably extremely ugly to boot.

Grif: No argument here.

Sarge: Over the years, I've been so disappointed in your work I've slowly stopped giving you things to do. Most days, I forget you even exist.

Grif: Yeahhh. . . it's been a good run.

Sarge: I think we all need to realize that Simmons. . . is not coming back. At least until Ruby gets here and drags his ass back.

Grif: Oh right. . . Man, I feel bad for him.

Sarge: But for now, Red Team is just going to have to make do with what few worthless soldiers we have left.

Grif: Wait, didn't this start out as a pep talk?

Sarge: We may never know why Simmons left. . .

Grif: Yeah, maybe he was overwhelmed by all the positive reinforcement you gave out.

Sarge: . . .but the fact of the matter is, we're at war! So, if we're gonna win this thing. . . we need to work together. We need to put aside our disgusting laziness and our constant attempts to kill each other in our sleep-

Grif: That's only you when Ruby isn't here, which makes when she's here a godsend.

Sarge: Damn it Grif, this is a compromise! I've realized I'm going to have to give up some things as well.

Meanwhile, on the fake Blue approached the Red Base to see Donut standing on the roof, directly above the entrance.

Donut: Halt! Who goes there?

Simmons: Donut, it's me.

Donut: Oh right, you. What do you want?

Simmons: I want to talk to Sarge, I just found out some info. Wait, why am I answering your questions?

The fake Blue tried to enter the base, but. . .

Donut: I said hold it!

The pink soldier aimed his rifle.

Simmons: What's your problem, Donut?

Donut: Sarge said not to let anyone in the base. And I'm pretty sure 'anyone' includes the enemy!

Simmons: I'm not the enemy.

Donut: Oh, please! You're dressed in Blue! FYI, there's kind of a theme around here. You're Blue, I'm Red.

Simmons: More like pink.

Donut: I have a gun.

Simmons: Okay, okay. I only dressed like this to trick the Blues.

Donut: You helped the Blues!

Simmons: And fooled them.

Donut: You knocked Sarge out! Twice!

Simmons: Once again Donut, to fool the Blues. And to work out some unresolved issues with father figures, but look, just go ask Sarge, he knows it's me. Hell, even Grif knows it's me.