Collide

Chapter 10

This is how their dorm looks like ,you can imagine it anyway you like but this is how i see it.

......
Davina was eating that book like it's the best meal she has ever had,letting the words consume her ,they take their place in her mind as her brain is a book and the words are being printed right through.

Time was passing and she didn't even feel like it had been hours sitting on the same oak wood chair with off-white cushions ,Until the dorm door was being shut.

Her head shoots up ,looking at the time it was half past midnight ,a lot after curfew .She didn't really know if it was the whole pot of caffeine she drank or the amount of information-even though it was common knowledge- in the book between her small yet gentle hands. No, she didn't feel tired but she felt in need of someone to talk to ,someone to hear her talk about everything and nothing ,someone who will listen about how much she loves these muggle bands or just simply someone there.

There are a lot of people she considers friends, even good friends but it feels like there is no one at the same time , she is scared to drive her friends away by telling them about her childhood or relationship with her father.

But instead, she puts on this tough face like no one has ever crushed her soul ,her bubbly spirit .She didn't know who to blame for that Niklaus Claire or... Draco Malfoy.

She wishes she could go back to simpler times where she could laugh and not feel like the whole world is dying beneath her finger tips or having a deep conversation with someone without holding in too much about herself , oh the pain she feels when she has to pretend everything is okay all the time.

Even in this little room she is in ,she still puts on that face .Scared to face herself with the reality of the broken soul she holds in her fragile body , So much she is holding on and for what? She think.

Why am I scared of opening up? Why can't i be like Hermione happily sharing memories of her childhood or like Ron who curses his siblings left and right but still smiling when he talks about his family or like Harry not letting the death of his parents keep him from living , breathing at least .He shares so much and without worry that he will drive his friends away.

This isn't living Davina ,she tells herself.

Im merely just surviving at this point ,in need of something to numb the pain she is feeling, she tried all the fucking healthy coping mechanisms people talk about ,she really did.

She tried painting ,it turned out like shit .She tried playing the piano but it wasn't for her, She tried writing in a diary but whenever she looks at the couple of pages she wrote ,it's all filled with curse words and hate towards her upbringing.She tried Quidditch ,it's simply no. She even tried a soothing bath with bubbles but she ended up crying for hours in that tub .She tried hanging around people but it brought her even more misery.

So she gave up on these so called fucking healthy coping shits.

She snaped back from her trip down fucking failurs at fixing herself ,when she heard the water kettle boiling out in the kitchenette,and Malfoy is looking for a mug but he is just too loud.

Merlin help her, she needs a drink. She put on her grey robe over her night wear and headed out to enjoy a cup or ten of firewhiskey , she didn't even care that Malfoy was there.

She opened her door her eyes fell upon the blond wizard trying to make himself a cup of tea , she stood by her bedrooms door scanning the whole place , She steps out to the kitchenette where Malfoy notices her but doesnt say anything , she picks up a bottle of firewhiskey not even bothering with a cup.

She sits on the couch with her little blanket wrapping around her torso with the bottle in hand and takes a big sip ,letting the alcohol fill her up ,it burns her throat but that is the fun in it , she then takes another one and another one until the bottle is half empty.