Loverboys || Wolfstar Raising Harry Au

nightmares

April 18 1982

Sirius was running.He was running as fast he could.He turned left then right then left again.He didn't stop.Not when he stepped into mud,not when he was almost hit by a car and not when he bumped into kids trick-or treating,and their angry parents.His heart raced and with every step he took the beating rose.

He stopped.Tears filled his eyes when he saw that the gate of the small house was blasted off.He felt a lump in his throat as he stepped to the porch and saw that the door of the house was half open.He immediately drew out his wand and pushed the door open.He stepped inside.The lights were closed the moonlight lighting the living room.He looked at his left were the couch and the coffee table were.He turned his head to the right holding his wand up.

He froze.He felt a shivering feeling surpass him.The room suddenly started spinning,he felt his throat closing,his breathing coming out uneven.Tears filled his eyes.

"No no no no no no no" he muttered.He ran to the stairs and dropped on his knees halfway up next to the body of his best friend.His eyes were open looking but not seeing.His face was pale.His hair ruffled,his glasses crooked on his face.He seemed so unsettling peaceful.

"No,no please please" Sirius pleaded tears falling down his cheeks.He set his best friend's body on his lap and placed a trembling palm on his cheek.His skin was cold as ice.

"J-James please please you have to wake up.Please!" he cried.

"Please..." he whispered

He cried hugging his best friend.Muffled sobs came us he burried his face on the deads boy's chest.

"Im so sorry" he said through muffled screams.

He gasped sitting up from the bed.Sweat dripping down his forehead.He tried to control his quick breathing.

Remus shuffled next to him.

"Sirius?What happened baby?"he said sleepily sitting up as well and looking at the boy.

"Nothing just a nightmare.Go back to sleep."

"Do you want to talk about it?"

Sirius sighted.Did he want to talk about it?

"You never told me what happened that night." Moony said gently as if reading his mind.

Tears filled his eyes again.He opened the drawer next to him and took a tiny box out.He drew a cigarette from it and lit it up.He inhaled some smoke.

"You wouldn't want to know Moony." Sirius said slowly.

"Please."

Sirius sighted.Nevertheless he took a deep breathe.

"You were in those missions Dumbledore sent you too."

"I was sitting in the living room,reading the Daily Prophet.I remember the horrible feeling as the realisation sunk in."

"I ran outside.I rode the motorcycle and flied over the city"

"The roads where full with muggles.I had to land some blocks before their house so I-I wouldn't be seen."

"Which is stupid really now that i think about it. I mean if I had went straight to their house maybe i would have been in time."

Sirius inhaled some more smoke his hand trembling against the cigarette,eyes clouded with his thoughts.

"I left the motorcycle in the middle of the road.I ran as fast as I could.I couldn't have gone faster really."

"I was too late."

Remus shivered at the statement.

"James was at the stairs."Sirius took another long puf from his cigarette.

"Lily was at the nursery.So was Hagrid who was carrying Harry.

"I begged him to give him to me." Sirius said in a hurried way like he was trying to get it over with.

Begged. That's what really hit Remus.Sirius never begged.

"When he wouldn't budge I went after  Pettigrew. You know the rest."

Sirius didn't cry.He was tired of doing so.He just looked blankly at the wall in front of him.But Remus did.Tears streamed down his face and his chest stiffened at what he heard.

"I will kill that rat with my bare hands next time i get the chance."

"Sirius no."

"He took everything from us." he said getting up .Remus grabbed his hand but Sirius didn't look at him.

"It's not your fault.If you couldn't have saved them no one could."

"Then why do i feel like it is?" .He escaped his grip and went outside the room Remus not even being able to stop his tears.

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Next morning Remus woke up with a headache.Sirius wasn't in the bed.He didn't know if he never came to bed last night or if he had woken up before him.  He went inside Harry's room that they have made to pick up the two year old.

Cold sweat ran at his forhead when he realised that Harry wasn't on his crib.He ran to the living room and was relieved at the sight in front of him.

Sirius was sleeping on the couch his hair a mop on his head with Harry loudly snorring on his chest.

He smiled and went to the kitchen to make some coffee.

Half an hour later harry had woken up and was sitting on Sirius chest pulling at his hair.Remus was making a bag with their clothes.

Tomorrow was the day.The order would come to their house and they would move to a cottage that was hidden and protected from the death eaters.

"What are you looking at?" Said Remus struggling to close the overstuffed bag.

"Your ass"

"Haha really funny" Remus got up and took Harry from his arms.

"Hey baby-steeler give him back" said Sirius not moving."And i wasn't joking."

Remus blushed slightly.

"Are you nervous?"

"Yeah.But think of it this way if we don't survive all this bag stuffing that you've been doing would have been for nothing."

Harry giggled."See Harry agrees with me"

"This humour of yours is really killing me"

"Not more than these death eaters are"

Remus face palmed himself putting harry on the ground.

"But we are going to be okay love." said Sirius locking eyes with Remus."I won't let anything happen to you or Harry.No matter what."

"Neither will I" Remus leaned and planted a soft kiss on the others lips.

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Ah shit thnk you all for the views I'm so happy:))))Shit show is about to begin.;)