An angel and her demons.

4. Selfless

XANDERS POV

I know that Lottie has done nothing wrong, I know she is a kind, beautiful, perfect little angel and I love her so much. I just want to tell her that, but my stupid mouth won't let the words come out. When she left 11 years ago, it broke me. It broke everyone. I turned into an angry, cruel little boy. I lashed out at everyone and everything. I just wanted my little sister and my mommy back, but they weren't coming.

I felt completely alone. My mom and sister left. My dad and Alessandro threw themselves into work, so I never saw them. Elijah was never home, he was out with girls, at the gym or with Alessandro. Enzo was twelve, he tried to take care of us, but he was still a kid himself and he was struggling. Me and Xavier didn't speak for two years. Little Teo, was six, he didn't know what was happening and he cried for his sister and mom every night, until one night he stopped and instead became the little prankster. He tried cheering everyone up with his pranks, but it never worked.

Our family was practically broke, and I blamed my mom and Charlotte.

Then 4 years later my dad died. If our family wasn't breaking before, it was completely shattered now. Ales took over all of my dad's business and mafias, with Elijah becoming his second, so we really only saw them 2 times a week, and that was when they came to shout at us for either fighting or for causing trouble for Enzo, who was now playing mom and dad.

Then fast forward 6 years, the princess has been found. She comes home, knowing she had a perfect life, and we were all fucked up.

Its unfair. She is so happy and bubbly, she makes everything brighter. She is naïve as fuck and I hate her for it.

Don't get me wrong, I am happy that she had a good childhood, but it's unfair. Now that I notice though, I don't think I've ever seen her get upset about her mom or dad which is super weird.

Little miss perfect is either a bitch who doesn't care or hiding something.

Probably the first, that is why I can't let her come into my home and act like everything is okay.

I hate her for being happy and I hate myself for hating her for that. I don't know if I am happy my sorellina is home or not. Maybe deep down I am, but right now I wish she'd fuck off back to California and back to her perfect little life, because she will get corrupted and her life will suck with 6 overprotective, overbearing, angry, mafia brothers.

I just came back from a late-night run, when little miss perfect bumped into me and nearly fell down the stairs. Clumsy idiot.

"Watch where the fuck you're going, pathetic bitch. You do realise that not one of us wants you here, the only one who does is the law. So, don't act like we want you, the second you turn 18. You will be kicked out. You may share blood, but Charlotte. You are not family." I spat at her, hoping that would tempt her to run back to her friends in California, I didn't mean a word and it hurt to say. I am just trying to protect her from what is the fucked-up curse of the Valentinos. We all either die or crumble, I want her to thrive. I want my baby sister to be happy, and if that means losing her.

So be it.

I hate that I'm being so selfless. I wish I could be selfish for once.

It hurts me that I am pushing her away so much, but I know its what's best.

Best for her.

It's best for her.

To take my mind off of Charlotte I decided to take some pleasure in messing with Teo.

Matteo was still out with some cheerleader for the night, its probably Chelsea or Courtney, they are the team's flyers. He has a special, friend with benefits, relationship with them as they are the only girls who never seem to get attached to him. A lot of people think it's because they are actually in a secret relationship with each other and use boys to hide it.

So, using this information, I decided tonight would be the perfect time to get revenge for him bedazzling my x-box last week.

I walked into Teo's room, I set a trap. So, the second he comes in his room, a bucked of glitter will drop on his head. I am an evil genius.

As I finished setting up the prank, I heard sniffles coming from Charlottes room.

"Shit." I whispered.

Did I make her cry?

I couldn't have, it was only a few meaningless words.

The sniffles stopped for a few moments. Until they into turned to crying which then turned to full sobs. Then muffled screams.

"Shit. Shit. Shit." I pulled my hair through my hands, if I need to stop being selfish and walk away. I left Matteo's room and walked straight past Lorenzo who was coming up the stairs. He glared at me as the cries were getting louder.

"Xander!" he stated.

"Enzo!" I replied, mocking his tone.

"Don't. Do you not hear your sister." he seemed really angry, and an angry Lorenzo could even scare Elijah and Ales.

"I hear it. I'm ignoring it." I replied with a bored tone.

"Fuck you Xander. Wait till your brothers hear about this. The eye rolling was one thing, the little snide comments another. If she's crying because of you, you will be sleeping in the garden." He pushed his finger into my chest before sprinting up the stairs.

I stood on the stairs; I felt my eyes go glassy.

No.

No.

NO!

I can't let myself care about her. If I care about her, I get hurt, she gets hurt. Nothing good can come from me caring. All it will do is give our enemies a way to destroy us, that is all. Yet, I know I do care but showing it will cause problems.

Why is my life so complicated, if she hadn't left all those years ago everything would be fine and we wouldn't be in this dilemma.

Before I realised what I was doing, I realised I was stood in her doorway.

Watching her thrashing, screaming.

She was having a nightmare. Enzo was trying to wake her up.

"Stop you're scaring me." she cried in her sleep.

My heart dropped into my stomach.

I can't do this.

I can't let my little baby sister, my bambina, my Lottie. I can't let her have nightmares, I am guessing they are about me since I yelled at her. I hate myself for hurting her, I didn't think she would care. They were just words.

I just want her to be safe, I know that if our enemies find out about her, they will see her as our weakness. If they see that, they will use it against the whole family and she will get hurt. I can't let that happen. Yet, I can't let her get hurt by me either.

I'm conflicted.

I vowed to protect her, yet maybe I am the one she needs protecting from. I hate this.

I need to change my tactics and be there for her.