I want to be her 『𝙱𝚞𝚌𝚔𝚢 𝙱𝚊𝚛𝚗𝚎𝚜』

Chapter Eight - Goodbye, again

You walked through the Shield Headquarters, the only sound was your heels against the polished floor. It was late at night, and eerily quiet. You’d only ever been here when there was other people around, and usually another team member was with you. Which is why it kept reminding you how alone you would be, when you left New York. When you left America. “Fury I need a favour,” you said, pushing open the door to his office.

“You could knock,” said Fury, standing up from his desk. When you didn’t respond with a sarcastic remark, he gestured for you to sit down. “How can I help?”

You took a seat, and handed him the signed papers for your transfer. “Don’t tell the others I’m leaving,” you sighed, as Fury checked through the papers, signing a few forms, “I can’t say goodbye again, you know?”

“If that’s what you want,” said Fury, filing the papers.

You laughed, “yeah right,” you scoffed, “Because this is what I want,” you leaned back in your chair, “None of this is fair, you know?” Fury sat down in front of you. Only a couple weeks ago, you were just living in the tower normally. You had no feelings towards Bucky. You didn’t care about his relationship with Nat. You didn’t feel lost without him. And now all that had changed. “I hate Bucky for what he did to me,” you said, sitting up.

“Trust me,” said Nick, “I do too,”

You looked away, “But I can’t even look at him without falling more and more in love,” you sighed, standing up, “Anyway, I’ll be ready to leave when you need me okay,” you forced a smile as you turned to leave.

“Y/n,” Nick called after you, “Tell Bucky,”

“Why should I?”

“We both know you will,” he responded, you knew he was right, which you hated.

You sighed, leaning against the doorframe. “All the memories come back, he never does,” the unfortunate thing was that all the good memories of Bucky came back, and the more they did, the less you cared about how bad Bucky messed up. “I can’t even pretend to hate him." You sighed, shaking the weird vulnerability, “I’m ready to leave as soon as you need me,” you smiled before walking out the door.

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You were back at Fury’s office two days later. After being called down in an ‘emergency’ text. “Agent Y/L/N,” said Nick, as you walked into his office, “Are you ready to leave tonight?” he asked you, before you’d even taken a seat.

“Yeah” you responded quickly. The past two days you had mostly spent sat analysing your decision and working out whether you should have said yes. “Let me know what time the car will arrive, okay?” you looked at the floor. Yes, you had your doubts, but leaving is the best thing for you. Distracting yourself from everything else going on. It was the best thing.

“Did you tell Bucky?” asked Fury.

Another thing you’d been thinking over. “No,” you stated firmly, “And I don’t plan on telling him either, so you can save your speech,” you sighed, “He’s moved on and so should I, that’s why I’m leaving,”

“Bullshit, but okay,”

You rolled your eyes, “I’ll call you from Europe,” you said.

“Vienna,” said Fury, handing you another file. You opened it to find images of your apartment, the key, files on agents in your division. Holy shit. You were about to run a shield divison in Europe.

“I’ll call you from Vienna,” you said, closing the file and leaving his office. In less than twenty four hours you would have your own shield division. You would be living in Vienna. You could have a new start. Okay you had to be chill about this. You had a lot of responsibility and you had to prove you could handle it.

Later that night, a limousine pulled up outside your apartment building. You grabbed your bags, closing and locking your apartment door behind you. Most of your stuff was staying here, because your apartment in Vienna was already furnished.

When you got to the airport, you were already running late. It got worse, when you ran into a familiar face. Sam. “Leaving without saying goodbye?” he asked you. You sighed, of course he would be here. Because you told him you were leaving and he put up a fight then. And he will now.

“Sam what are you doing here?”

“I could ask you the same question,” you rolled your eyes, it was kind of obvious why you were here, “You’re going on your own?”

“Does that surprise you?” you responded. “I’m going to Vienna, yes on my own, no I don’t want company, and no I don’t care about how this is going to effect Bucky when he finds out. Has that answered your questions? Can I go now?”

Sam looked at the floor, “I wanna come with you,” he said quietly.

“What’s going on?” you asked him.

“I don’t want to lose you,” he responded, “You’re going to Vienna, that’s far away Y/n, a completely different timezone, you know? This is. Just not. I’m happy for you of course, but I don’t want you to leave,”

You sighed, a conflict of interest. “I have to go,” you said, turning away. Sam gently grabbed your wrist. You bit your tongue, “So you’re just going to leave everyone?” you asked him.

“Are you?” he said, “Please don’t go, let me take you to dinner in Vienna, just don’t, please don’t go alone, please please let me come with you,” why was your heart breaking at his words. You didn’t need someone, you didn’t need anyone to come with you. But at the same time you wanted him to come.

It would be nice to have someone with you, someone that you knew and were close with to be by your side. “Okay fine,” you said, noticing the tiny smile that crept onto Sam’s face, “But I’m not signing you onto my division,” you remarked sarcastically, grabbing your bag.

“Oh that’s how it is?” he said, still smiling.

“That’s how it is,” you responded, laughing.