Tour Guide || K.SJ

36. Before you go

Despite it being nighttime soft rays of light entered the apartment through the entrance, it was enough for you to make out the person's face. The last eyes you wanted to meet tonight were staring right at you in despair.

You stared at Jin in horror.

Jin looked at you in pain.

The state he witnessed you in today was going to scar him for life. The look you gave him made him feel hollow. He knew the day he dreaded the most has come and there's no going back. He felt disgusted at himself for his actions, for pushing you till you were at your limit. He knew this was going to happen one day if he didn't tell you the truth and yet he decided to act selfish and didn't want to risk losing you.

"Y-y/n-" He panted out through a broken voice, abandoning his car in the middle of the traffic jam because he was in a rush, and running all the way here was making it hard for him to breathe and focus.

Before Jin could further say anything you started stumbling towards your room. You knew you didn't want to face him today or ever. You knew seeing his face would only tear you into shreds. Jin ran inside and held you by your sides to stop you. You struggled to get out of his grip but it was only useless and when you realized that you stopped.

"Y/n please just listen to me. I beg you." He said out desperately refusing to let you go otherwise. You didn't make eye contact with him, you were scared of what you would see if you did. You were not ready to witness the look of pity Jin was giving you cause if you did it would prove that what you saw in the billboard today was actually true. 

"Y/n I-"

"Was it fun?" Confusion was evident on Jin's face as you cut him off through an emotionless voice. 

"What?-"

"Was it fun playing around with me? was I enough entertainment in your busy life Kim Seokjin?"  The bitter tone in your words made Jin become speechless. He continued to stare at you dumbfounded, he couldn't recognize you. The look in your eyes, your words, nothing was like the Y/n he knew.

"You took me for granted and made a joke out of me, I know I also lied to you in the beginning and you knew it better than anyone else that I lied but is this how you punish me? By making me feel this worthless." Your every word continued to pierce through Jin's heart.

"Believe me I was about to tell you everything on my own-" Jin was fumbling over his words, everything was falling apart before him.

"Tell me what? that you're not the person I thought you were all this time. Jin, look at me I'm in pain can't you see that? I fell in love with you and I don't even know who you are." Not a single tear spilled through your eyes as you began to say words that you knew was breaking Jin and like a double-edged sword was stabbing you as well. In the darkroom lit only by the moonlight you could see the agony in Jin's face.

"Y/n I really love you with my all, my love for you was never fake."

Hearing his words made you miserable.

"Who are you?"

You faltered and fell on the floor with your back pressed against the wall. You had no strength left in your body, saying those three words shattered you. Jin let go of you and looked at you through wide eyes not believing what he just heard, he took a step back and collapsed on the floor as well. His head hung low as his hands began to shake hysterically. In the silence, no one spoke.

Both of you were broken into pieces.

No one had anything to say. We both lost in the game of love. You finally decided to look up say the words that were roaming in your head for a long time. You can't believe you were going to say this but it's for the better.

"Jin, let's take a break from each other."  You whispered out.

Jin shot his head up the moment he heard you. Terror was written all over his face, he crawled towards you and grabbed your hands as tightly as ever. His shuddering hands were colder than yours.

"N-no y/n p-please I beg you. I can't live a moment without you." He began stuttering crazily as tears began spilling out of his eyes endlessly. It ached you to see Jin like that but this time you decided to put your feelings first. You needed some time to think on your own.

"Jin I-"

"Slap me! cry out loud! scream at me! call me names do whatever you want but don't leave me Y/n." The teardrops glittered on Jin's face under the moonlight as he held both your hands with his and rested his forehead against it. Your lips began quivering at the sight.

"I promise I'll come back to you one day but I really want some time alone to cope up with the reality." You tried hard not to stutter as you spoke.

"Please please forgive me, I'll do anything to earn your forgiveness. I love you, I love you so much. Please give me one more chance."

You rested your forehead on Jin's shoulder and he immediately wrapped his arms around you.

"I know, but please let me go this time. I will make it back to you, I promise." You said with your eyes shut, feeling Jin's warmth for the last time. Jin tightened the hug and continued to sob against your neck. 

After a while of being in each other's arms, it was finally time to say goodbye. 

You broke the hug and looked at Jin's glossy brown eyes. He tried his best not to cry as tears would make his sight hazy and he wanted to see your face clearly for the last time. Both of you stood up and kept on staring at each other.

Finally, you flashed a forced smile at him which he tried his best to return while continuously wiping his eyes with his sleeves.

"Goodbye Jin." You said quietly. Jin nodded his head and blinked multiple times.

"Goodbye." He said with one last glance at you and slowly made his way out of the house.

Jin closed the door as he left and the entire apartment became pitch black. You picked up the vase from the floor and slowly walked towards the kitchen. Taking out the vase you placed it on the dining table. You didn't feel like turning on the lights and decided to light candles instead.

Lighting the stove you turned around to find the candles but stopped when your eyes fixed on the vase. The vase which you bought so excitingly to place the flowers Jin gave you in. You couldn't shift your gaze away from it and blankly stared at it.

"Slap me! cry out loud! scream at me! call me names do whatever you want but don't leave me Y/n."  Jin's helpless crying face appeared in front of you making your heart clench.

How did we end up like this?

Loud footsteps echoed in the room as Taehyung came rushing into the kitchen and pulled you towards him with great force.

"Y/n get away from the stove, the flowers are on fire!"

A moment of silence for the random girl on the street whose scream made Y/n look at the billboard and shit went down.