𝑻𝒓𝒂𝒑𝒅𝒐𝒐𝒓 ✘ 𝐍𝐀𝐓𝐀𝐒𝐇𝐀 𝐑𝐎𝐌𝐀𝐍𝐎𝐅𝐅

{4¹⁰} {CONSEQUENCES AND GUILT}

∆ {4¹⁰} {CONSEQUENCES AND GUILT} ∆ 

BERLIN WAS PRETTY.

If Roxi ignored what she was there for, she could focus on the 60-year-old architecture mixed with the newer looking, gleaming skyscrapers with walls of glass, and the way that everything moved so well. She could hear chatter carried up on the wind through the open window she sat by, occasionally hearing a seagull or a songbird letting out a cry or a chirp. They communicated so well, even over different species. 

The Avengers were all the same species - with the exception of Thor, who wasn't present, and Vision - and yet, they could never seem to get along without at least one of them creating some sort of issue. Whether it be to do with how people were acting, their plans on how to carry something out, even what somebody was wearing or how they were saying, one of them would always find something to argue about. The only time that they were able to work well together was when the world was ending, and that was most certainly not a healthy way to live with your co-workers. In fact, it might've been the worst way.

And now the Accords had come along, driving a wedge into the largest crack - the one between Steve and Tony - and had widened it further than Roxi had ever thought was possible, leaving half of them stranded on one side of a chasm, and one side on the other. It would make everything worse. All of the smaller cracks that had branched of from the largest would elongate and widen with it, and new ones would open up on ground that they'd previously thought to be perfectly steady.

This would affect them far more greatly than any of them had initially suspected, though Roxi assumed that the others were starting to see the damage that it would cause. After all, it had only taken a high-speed car chase, several grenades and near-murders from Bucky Barnes to show them how severe things might become, and Roxi still had a feeling that they wouldn't see the true consequences of their actions until they had been and passed. It was dangerous, and becoming akin to taking a shot in the dark without caring for where the bullet landed.

While Roxi agreed more with Tony's side of things, her priorities would be to keep Natasha alive, then keeping all of her team - not Tony's, not Steve's, hers - alive. Then would come Tony's side; the government, the Accords. Their lives were far more important than this internal warring that they would most likely all come to regret so harshly in a few years' time. Roxi didn't doubt that they would all do something that they would regret in years to come in the next few days. She knew she would, and that it would bug her day in and out for the next few years, and also that however hard she tried to prevent it, it would still happen.

She'd tried it before. Dealing with regret by trying not to have anything to cause it in the first place. She had learned, however, that there would always be things that they would regret, things that were in the past, ones that she wouldn't be able to change, and even if she'd known what her mistake was before going into the situation, she doubted she would've been able to do something to change the outcome. If she somehow did, she would simply find something else to regret, and the cycle would continue onwards; inevitably, insatiably.

Regret was always there, no matter what you did. Even the smallest things; something you had said that you wished you could take back, an action that would make you felt stupid. It was still regret, a guilt that ate away at the corner of your mind until you gave into it. That could happen in so many ways. You could quite literally give up, allow it to take over your mind. You could simply write over it in your brain, choosing to ignore the mistakes you had made in an ignorance that many people would hate. Or, you could learn from it, as so many people tried and failed to do. Roxi would do any; it depended completely on the circumstances. But with the Accords, and the level that things were already escalating at, made Roxi think that none of the above would be an option. She'd have to try and find a way to work through her guilt. A new way.