Failed Mission

He's In My Head

"How did it go?" Alyssa grilled me, sitting on the couch in our living room, a bowl of freshly made up popcorn resting in her lap. She popped a piece in her mouth and crunched loudly which made my eye twitch slightly.

"Uh," I hesitated slightly, leaning against the doorway to the living room, unsure whether I should be honest or sugarcoat it. "It was rough." I decided to be honest.

"Well?" Alyssa urged, picking up more popcorn in her fists, "Go on!"

I crossed my arms over my chest and chewed on my lip anxiously. "We didn't get far in. The copycat soldier had the upper hand...." Everything drowned out around me as I began to tell her the incident the boys and I had experienced, along with meeting John Walker. Her eyes had widened and her face had contorted into multiple emotions: worry, fear, anger, concern and the last one was confusion when I brought up the Voltic Witch. I didn't know why I was so hesitant on telling the boys about it and cool with telling Alyssa.

"Voltic Witch?" She repeated, confusion dancing within her eyes, "What the hell is that?"

"If I knew, I'd tell you. Don't tell the boys either, they don't know." A sigh was heard from me and I walked down, sitting beside her on the couch and digging into the popcorn bowl to feed myself. "It's definitely something to do with this electrical thing running around inside of me. I almost zapped John Walker."

She choked on her popcorn after having laughed but she recovered, taking a big swig of her water, "I'd pay to see that." I smiled slightly, feeling a little amused at her statement, before popping some of the buttery popcorn into my mouth, chewing quietly on it.

"Why didn't you tell the boys?" She asked me, turning all serious and I shrugged immediately, "I don't know. Maybe because they might see me differently? I mean, I'm sure Sam already does. He assumed I'd kill an innocent person." My heart cracked slightly as I recalled his statement and I glanced down at my hands which were clasped tightly together.

What if it was true and I did eventually kill an innocent? I didn't know the capabilities or the strengths that this ability held. Especially when I couldn't control it... it was dangerous.

"Hey..." Alyssa spoke quietly, placing her hand over my clasped ones, "You're not going to hurt anybody. You'll learn how to control it." She must have noticed my unconvinced expression that formed on my face because she sighed, "(y/n), you're not a harmful person. You don't hurt people on purpose... you never have. Sam's an idiot for even saying that to you in the first place."

No matter how much I yearned to believe and agree with her statement, I couldn't. Her efforts to cheer me up didn't help at all, I still felt like a danger to society.

"I'm gonna go to bed." I stood up, my hands peeling away from hers. "It's been a rough day."

Exhaustion prickled at my skin and I turned on my heels, making my way upstairs to my bedroom slowly. I was exhausted, but I knew I wouldn't be able to sleep and if I did manage it, I had a feeling that nightmares would claw their way into my head.

I stripped off my clothes and threw them in the corner of my bedroom before crawling into the plush comfort that was my bed. It felt like it had been years since I felt my own blankets wrapped around me along with my head nestled into my pillow.

I flicked off my lamp but laid there, my eyes wide open as I stared into the darkness around me. I couldn't shove away the thoughts of the incident on the truck, the way I just fried Adrian and the sight of his body that was left, the way I almost zapped John Walker in his car. I shook my head, trying to shove the images away and when the images did disappear, Sam's voice rattled in my brain.

"The idea of you accidentally killing an innocent isn't exactly what we need."

I groaned quietly, rolling onto my back and rubbing my temple with my palm, a small headache starting to from how active my brain was being. When it decided to make its departure, I reached over and snatched my phone off of the end table that was beside my bed and I swiped it unlocked.

I wasn't sure what overcame me but I pulled up Bucky's number and started tapping at my keyboard.

"Do you think I'll kill someone innocent?"

His reply was basically instant.

"No."

I stared at his response, biting my lip gently before yet again, tapping at my keyboard.

"Are you being honest?"

Again, his response was instant.

"Yes."

I left the conversation as is and locked my phone, setting it back to its allocated spot before rolling over on my side, my back to my bedroom door. It gave me a small comfort knowing that Bucky didn't think I was capable of hurting someone who didn't deserve it.

"It doesn't matter how loud you scream for him to come and get you, he won't hear you." The copycat soldier's voice whispered in my ear. I saw nothing but darkness as I was blindfolded but I could tell he was leaned over the chair I was tied to because it creaked and he was extremely close, his voice making the hairs within my ears stand up still. "I told you I'd have my fun."

My heart was pounding within my throat, unable to let me breathe. Sharp objects were dragged over my skin lightly and I felt every muscle it passed over tense up within my body tightly and fear was bearing it's big fists around my stomach, causing me to tremble.

I didn't know where I was or how I got here. All I know is that my mind and my heart ached for Bucky to come to save me, but he couldn't.

I felt something harsh lash against my skin like a whip and I let out a pained scream and I didn't get the chance to recover before another lashing was heard.

"Look at her shake, boss and she's meant to be the Voltic Witch?" The maniacal females' voice appeared from behind me, her heels clattering along the tiled floor. "She can't even help herself."

I tore myself away from my nightmare and sat up in my bed quickly, breathing heavily. I didn't even notice I had fallen asleep.

A pop and a fizzle were heard above me and I noticed white sparks flying out from my ceiling light.

"Shit!" I hissed quietly, realizing I had blown out the power in my room while I was knee-deep into my nightmare.

My hands fizzled out the electricity and I picked up my phone, dialing the first person who popped into my head.

"Hello..?" Bucky's groggy voice met my ear.

"I need your help."