Fell In Love In Stages // a matty healy fanfic

MySpace

I emerged from my nap. This is how I cope with distress. I hide away in sleep. A place between life and death, where one is free to wander as they please. A place where no real harm comes to you.
Outside, the day has creased into evening, clear but darkened. The sky is a deep, dying blue. A pale sun has set and left behind streaks of silver clouds.
I brew a cup of tea for myself and sit in my desk, mindlessly scrolling through myspace.
I visit Charlie's profile and I'm immediately greeted by a shirtless mirror selfie of him while 'The Next Episode' by Snoop Dogg and Dr. Dre plays in the background. The lime green on red text makes it difficult to read but I notice the "last login" has today's date. It's nice to see I'm still at the top of the top 8, amongst a sea of friends. I click on the photos tab and see one new upload. It was a picture of an airplane window and the caption read, "Cali here I come". I stare at my screen, puzzled. I check the date again. Today's date. Huh. That's odd. But I'm not surprised. Charlie has left without saying goodbye before, it wasn't anything new. But after the talk we had today, I was really hoping for a breakthrough. Guess I was mistaken.
But before I could mope on that, my screen lights up with a new friend request.
"Knock Knock" it read from one Matty Healy.
I deliberately delay accepting his request by stirring my tea cup mindfully. I know he sees the green "online" that is displayed next to my name and I smile to myself, imagining him getting antsy. I finally accept and visit his profile.
Red text on a plain black wallpaper bordered with black and white checks. "I Wanna Dance With Somebody" by Whitney Houston plays in the background and the stark contrast between the song choice and the theme of the profile makes me laugh.
A message pops up that reads

Date: July 11, 2006, 7:04 PM
Subject: almost left me hanging, there.
Body: hey little bird. fancy meeting you here. just scrolled through your profile. i still have no clue who you are.

Date: July 11, 2006, 7:07 PM
Subject: Almost.
Body: You didn't think I was gonna make it THAT easy for you, did you? I on the other hand, know exactly what you're all about, Healy.

M: is that so?
T: That is so.
M: and what am i all about, then?
T: Judging from your profile, you care very much about how people perceive you. How many hours did you spend tweaking it?
A couple minutes go by without a reply, until finally.
M: huh, i guess i do care about how people perceive me. but not very much :)
T: Fair.
M: but i suppose the same could be said about you. you may not have an online presence. but you care.
T: And what makes you so sure?
M: well this is all speculation of course and correct me if I'm wrong, but you don't carry yourself like someone who doesn't care. not a single hair out of place, every time i've seen you.
Hmm he seems to know more than he lets on, I think to myself.
T: You're not entirely wrong.
M: so tell me. why is your profile a blank sheet of paper?
I think it over for a moment
T: I do not wish to be perceived.
M: Fair.