Dear Kim

📃CHAPTER TWENTY ONE | FOR KIM

Three months had passed since I left Seoul and my life was back to its norm. My parents accepted me with a warm welcome. My mother did so for the sake of the special bond of motherhood and my father smiled on my arrival because his investment with the Singhs was safe. I Priya Kapoor was back at Boston with a masked smile on my face and a hole in my heart.

My parents supported my career in photography but my father instructed me to give it up the moment I got married. To my father, a fulfilled wife was one who dedicated her entirety to her husband and children. Photography was the only happiness I had left and for the sake of marriage to a man I did not love, I was to be striped of the only thing that gave me joy.

It was spring. The whites of winter gave way to the healthy green of leaves and the brilliant colours on petals a thousand. Butterflies flaunted the beauty of their wings under the rays of the golden sun and birds flapped their feathers proudly as they chirped songs in whistled notes.

The clear blue skies showered its blessing on the Singhs' large villa in Boston. It was a beautiful day for a celebration. It was one of the celebrations I spent a year running from. It was the day of wagdaan held for Rajesh Singh and me.

Wagdaan is one of the Indian ceremonies performed before the official marriage of a couple. It is an engagement ceremony that involves both families of the couple. At the wagdaan it is the duty of the groom's family to welcome the bride's family into their home.

The wagdaan is indeed a wonderful ceremony that includes exchange of vows and a commitment with a ring to signify the engagement of a couple. It is a tradition my family had always kept. One that brought joy to the household of most Indians, but to I Priya Kapoor, it was the start of a regretful life.

The Singhs' home was twice the size of my father's compound. Each building in their home glimmered under the sun due to the instalment of terracotta, marble and gems of every kind caught between the fine spaces of outstanding architectural work.

The huge compound was decorated with strings of ribbons aligned with silk patterns and helium pumped balloons. Fountains were lit by coloured bulbs which made the eye see rainbow waters when every drop kissed rays of the sun in decent curves. Varied dishes and meal courses were served by well-dressed waiters and waitresses.

Teenagers in sarees and dhoti sherwani ran on the lush green of carpet grass with stuffed faces. Men from the Singh and Kapoor family clinked glasses of expensive wine while they shared pleasantries and simple gestures. Women from both families trooped in and out of the room given to me by the Singhs. With wide smiles on their faces, they congratulated me and while some called me beautiful, others gossiped the word 'lucky'.

It was a joyful time for members of the Singh and Kapoor family. Every human jollied in the beauty of love under the influence of the spring's gentle sunshine. Every human was merry. Every human, but three. Melissa, Rajesh and I were the only people who knew the sorrow that followed that bright day.

While Melissa cried her eyes out at Singhs' backyard, Rajesh had sorrow-driven shots of tequila when his friends praised him for getting a pretty woman like me.

And me?

Well I stared at a huge mirror with an expressionless face while I got dressed by a team of stylists. Romantic songs by the Indian artist Arijit Singh echoed in the room. The stylists hummed and a few danced.

I recalled the day I was dressed up by Jin Sol, Seo Hyeon and Ji Ho for my first date with Tae Min. A smile swept across my face but a tear drop followed. It was cleaned instantly by a makeup artist who had to make sure I looked beautiful until the party was over. She said nothing and asked nothing. She wiped the tear and applied more kajal to my eyelids. She was dedicated to her job. They all were. I felt suffocated.