The Path to Hue

Part XII

I can't help but think about Skyler while walking through the mall, apparently she and Colin are on a break. They should be broken up by now. Can Sky still not process it? I know she's indecisive, but after the same situation happening twice? If anything, this one is worse. way worse. Even Colin admitting that it's the kind of person he is, there's no way they'd ever work in a healthy way. I just can't believe this shit.

"Ruby, are you okay?" Sunny meekly asks, I take a breath and try to chill out,

"Just... the situation, that's all. It keeps replaying in my mind, I genuinely can't think of anything else,"

"... I get it. Violet really gets me worried when she has these periods of silence towards me. I can't imagine how you feel about it, Ruby."

"Sunny, you don't think that... maybe we shouldn't keep giving Vi all these chances anymore?"

"No! I mean- maybe, but she's a better person from who she was. Influencers take a long time to change, I thought that was common knowledge,"

"Sunny, I don't think she understands the pain she puts us through, we have to put our foot down eventually,"

"But- but I can't lose her Ruby! She's my best friend! Since we were little, we know each other more than anyone. I'll always be there for her and I know she's do the same for me-"

"But would a best friend really not tell you what's been bothering her for over a month? That's not okay, especially for how long you've been friends! She can't mistreat you whenever she wants! And you won't lose her if you tell her how you feel,"

"But this is how it's always been! She distances herself but makes up for it, we always get over these rough patches Rubes. We'll be okay-"

"Ugh Sunny! Do you not hear yourself? You need to stop being an apologist for Violet! How do you feel about her constantly doing this? Do you think Violet even recognizes us as people with actual feelings?? She agreed to a date with me, lied to leave said date and fuck Skyler's boyfriend. Does that sound like a good friend to you?"

"I- I uh I didn't- I don't... " she's tearing up now and I realize that I've never seen her cry before. I can't do this. I can't be hurting people, not my friends. That's not who I am. That's not who I want to be. It's not who I want to be.

"I gotta go. Sunny, I- I'm so sorry,"

I walk into the nearest bathroom, lock myself into a stall, and try to gather myself. Recognize my surroundings so as to not spiral. I can't believe I made Sunny cry. She's been so understanding and this is how I repay her? What's wrong with me? Why do I keep hurting everyone I love? Maybe, I'm the problem. Violet left, Skyler can't fathom a scenario where we're together, I exploded at Jade and Bella, and now Sunny. It's all too much and I feel my palms sweating, my hands slip from the walls. My throat feels dry and I can no longer see what's in front of me. My breathing quickens and there's nothing I can attempt to ground myself. I breakdown for the first time in weeks, there's nothing I can do.

-

I head out after my panic attack, I'm pretty sure everyone in the mall could tell. My eyes are even more swollen than usual. I just want to fall asleep and not wake up. Stepping into my car, I recline my seat and try to close my eyes. It's so hard to keep my head empty. Time feels like it moves so slowly when you're emotionally distressed.

By the time I feel myself becoming drowsy, my phone blows up. Dings nonstop, no calls though. But I do have a bunch of texts from Skyler, they don't stop either. I've been tagged in a bunch of posts and comments though. I open up Instagram and it's... Colin? He's posted a blurry photo of Sky and it's captioned...

the feeling when your long-term girlfriend cheats on you with another girl, i ain't afraid to tag the bitch either. @rubyandyso, dyke ass bitch who took my girl. fuck both of those too, new song coming soon

What the actual fuck? And the comments aren't opposing his opinion either. His friends claim they've seen us makeout in the halls. That I had to convince Sky to leave him for months. I scroll underneath the post and see Violet commented too.

vivi_willow__ : ❤❤❤

Skyler's calling me now. I scramble to answer. It's the first time she's called me since we talked a month ago. I don't even know what to say, I pick up and stay silent. You can hear the brokenness in her voice, she's talking too fast and it's hard to understand a word she says..

"Sky, I need you to slow down. I saw the post."

"Ruby it's not just the photo, someone has a video of us on the roof.I didn't even think that was possible from where we were sitting. I can't believe this, I shouldn't have kissed you!"

"Hey! Colin got you high! It's not your fault! He's playing victim right now when we both know he did worse."

"I know, but. This is all my fault. I broke up with him today. And I was supposed to talk to Violet last Friday, but she's been blowing me off. And since I broke up with Colin, she's been posting him on her story nonstop-"

I check Vi's story and it's all true, she even unfollowed me. But she didn't block me, I guess she wanted to keep my follow. Fuck. I can't believe her ego.

"Look, I'll fix this for us, okay? I mean- not us, but- you know what I mean. I uh- I'll go now,"

"No wait!"

"Yeah?"

"Can you, come to the dorm? Uh... Bring some ice cream maybe?"

" I'll be there in 15."