Stepdad

THIRTEEN

Colson: what does ryker like?

Colson: like what is he into?

Allie: what do you mean?

Colson: every kid has a particular thing they like more than other things.

Allie: no

Colson: what do you mean no?

Allie: I know where this is going.

Allie: you're not spending money on my son.

Allie: he has enough toys, Colson.

Colson: I will spend my money as I please and buy him what he likes.

Allie: you really don't have to do that.

Colson: I know I don't have to. But I want to.

Colson: so let me do it.

Allie: if you absolutely have to.

Allie: he likes paw patrol.

Colson: really? I fucking love that show.

Allie: are you serious.

Colson: dead ass.

Allie: you're such a child.

Colson: whats wrong with me liking paw patrol 😒

Allie: do you know how many paw patrol episodes I have had to watch?

Allie: now I have to watch it with you.

Colson: hahaha I will watch it with ryker.

Colson: you aren't invited.

Allie: excuse me?

Colson: no girls allowed. boys night.

Colson: just me and ryker with a paw patrol marathon.

Allie: you're unbelievable.

Colson: might even cover the theme song for him.

Colson: play it on tour.

Colson: that would be sick.

Allie: I changed my mind.

Allie: If I dated you at this point I would feel like a pedo.

Allie: I would be dating a man child that watches paw patrol.

Allie: I bet you have a favorite pup.

Colson: who doesn't? it's rubble.

Colson: rubble on the fucking double.

Allie: omg stop.

Allie: what have I fucking started.

Colson: you still like me even though I watch paw patrol?

Allie: it's up for debate.

Colson: let's talk about it then.

Allie: ughhh stop it's 7 in the morning it's too early for this.

Colson: 7 am? Fuck, I'm gonna miss the new episode.

Allie: oh no don't miss the new episode.

Allie: don't let me keep you from it.

Colson: WHENEVER THERE'S A PROBLEM AROUND ADVENTURE BAY.

Allie: oh shut the fuck up.

Colson: this is why I'm gonna like ryker more.

Colson: you fun sucker.

Allie: this is why I like Dom more than you.

Allie: bet he don't watch paw patrol.

Colson: fuck you

Colson: his english ass probably watches peppa pig.