saige | t.lupin

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Saige hated going home for a reason. So, as she sat in her compartment aboard the Hogwarts Express, she began her yearly ritual in preparation. The chatter amongst her friends had long since faded into background noise as she intently started out the window, watching the rolling hills of Scotland slowly disappear. Anxiety slowly began to creep into her wandering mind. It wasn't the kind of anxiety one would feel before a difficult test, or perhaps awaiting important news. Her anxiety was ridden with fear; venom woven into the threads of her family, ice water prickling the skin as if she'd fallen through thin ice into a frozen lake. It was not a welcome feeling.

She gritted her teeth and gripped her fists into tight balls. She had controlled her emotions for so long, now was not the time to let them back in, to let the ice surrounding her heart finally melt. Collecting herself, she unfurled her hands, revealing the small crescents embedded into her palms, blood shining along the tips of her fingernails.

Finally turning her attention back towards her friends, her gaze met the concerned one of Victoria Mangle. She held eye contact for a moment while Victoria silently attempted to unravel the girl's unreadable expression.

It wasn't an unknown fact that Saige Stirling was the most secretive person in the school. No one knew who her parents were. Not to say that they didn't try to figure it out. Even the parents whose children asked about the Stirling's didn't know of the girl, or weren't willing to discuss such matters with their children. All that is known of her mother, Grace Stirling, is that she disappeared to France during the war, and hadn't since returned to the wizarding world.

The girl went quiet during holidays, answering seldom of the many owls sent with letters reaching out to her. And then, she would return to Hogwarts the following year, no change in expression and no news to tell of her break from school.

Saige Stirling was a mystery to everyone but herself, and that was how she liked it. She functioned on a need-to-know basis. Shrouding herself in secrets meant that no one could ask her questions about her life. About why she hated going home to her family. About why she refused to divulge anyone in the secrets of her life. No one would know that she could speak French, or that she hadn't gone a night in years without a nightmare. Her friends knew what they needed to know, and that was enough for her.

The train slowed to a halt, finally reaching Kings Cross after hours of travel. Saige stood and began to slowly gather her things. As she turned to leave the compartment, she felt someone gently grab her elbow.

"Are you okay?" Victoria asked as Saige turned to meet her eyes.

"Of course I am," Saige replied with a small smile, pushing past her concerned friend. She walked away without looking back. She knew her parents wouldn't be there to collect her from the train station, they hadn't done so since the start of her third year. Stepping off the train and onto the platform, Saige pulled her sleeves over her hands, nervous habits already beginning to creep back in, as they did every summer.

-

Saige hesitantly knocked on the heavy wooden door of her house, trailing her trunk behind her. As she waited for an answer, she looked around the once familiar surroundings of her home. Large trees shaded the forever extending property, small patches of flowers dotted the ground. The thick forest gleamed with the light of the setting sun and the faint gurgle of a pond could be heard. Of course, the place was now foreign to the girl, no longer the home she used to yearn for every year away at school. Saige was snapped out of her thoughts as the door suddenly opened and her mother stood to greet her.

"Oh, it's that time of the year already..." her mother spoke, her lips thinning together into a tight line.

"Indeed it is, Mum," she replied flatly, not surprised at her mother's aloofness.

"Who's there?" a low voice called from inside the house, making Saige and her mother jump.

"It's Saige, Darren," her mother called out. "She's back from school."

Her father made his way to the door and heavily lent against the doorframe, slitting his eyes at his daughter.

"Huh," he said breathily. "You're back already."

"I have to come home every summer dad, you know this," Saige replied, avoiding eye contact with her parents.

"Well," her father huffed. "You can't expect me to know anything, can you? It's not my world"

"I know," Saige sighed as she pushed past them into her house. She knew that her parents both well knew she came home for the summer, they just didn't care to remember. 

"Where do you think you're going?" her mother called after her as she trudged up the stairs to her room.

"Just leave her Grace," she heard her father grumble. "She'll shut herself in her room like always. We won't see her all holidays."

Saige opened the door to her bedroom, ignoring her fathers comments. Looking around, it obviously hadn't been touched since she left, surfaces gathering a thick layer of dust. She placed her trunk down and walked to the window, ripping open the heavy curtains and letting in streams of golden light. Saige always loved her bedroom as a child. Her safe space. It was a relatively small, square room with large windows offering views of the beautiful grounds. Her bed sat in the middle of the room, bundled with the many blankets the girl had collected over the years. Pictures of her family littered the room, the three gathered as a happy unit. Of course, all taken before her eleventh birthday and her father's discovery of magic. She sat gingerly on the edge of her bed, biting her nails as she watched the sun slowly set through the window and submerge her in darkness.