The Reasons I Hate You

01 | 3 rules

It was easy. I only had 3 rules. Order the most expensive things on the menu, leave before the bill comes and the most important one of them all, try not to punch him in the face.

Tonight the third rule was the hardest not to break. Usually, it wouldn't be this hard but this man was not the slightest bit tolerable. I can definitely see why someone would want me to do this to him. Sometimes I have no idea why I started doing this in the first place. It all started 3 months ago when my best friend, Mia, got her heart broken by a guy who looks like Ed Sheeran. Of course, we wanted revenge, so I made him take me out to the most expensive restaurant, got the most expensive meal, and then I gracefully climbed out the bathroom window before the bill was paid. If you order enough food, their cards will decline.

But it really started when a girl asked me to do this to her cheating boyfriend. Apparently, Mia had told some girls. I didn't even know her but of course, I'd help a girl out and I get free food. How could I ever say no to that? Then a bunch of girls piled into my DMs and that brings us to now.

The guy I was currently dining with was a cheater. The girl he's been cheating on is unbelievably beautiful and way out of his league. I have never met this man in my life but all it took was a simple text for him to cheat on his girlfriend of eight months. The audacity men have sometimes.

Now you could call me a shitty person for doing this but these men aren't exactly innocent. They're far from it. In my eyes these girls deserve justice and there's free food. You cant expect to me pass up on that.

"Fawn?" Brian calls out—or Brad, I can't remember his name.

I look up, being brought out of my thoughts.

"You zoned out there for a second." He chuckles, revealing his perfect set of teeth.

I give a weak smile, trying not to show the annoyance on my face. "Oh, sorry," I say, "What were you saying?"

"It's alright." He reassures. "I was just telling you about, Molly, my car. She was very expensive but definitely....."

I drown his voice out again, not paying attention. I keep myself from yawning and not falling asleep right then and there. Seriously, do men ever talk about something other than themselves?

"I'm gonna go the bathroom real quick," I say, getting up.

"Oh okay." He replies and I quickly rush over to the bathroom.

Thankfully no one was inside when I enter. I take a moment to check my appearance in the mirror and then pull out my phone to check the time. It's 8:07 so my ride should be here by now. Basically, my getaway car.

My phone dings and I already know its them telling me that they're here. Them as in, Mia, Olive, and sometimes my twin brother Preston. I don't know if he's with them today, he only comes when he's bored or has a fight with mom and dad. I pull out my phone to make sure it's from them because you can never really be too careful. Once I see that it is, I crunch my leg up and take my heels off my feet.

After they're both off I throw them over the window and hear them land with a thud on the concrete outside. The window was high up but I was used to climbing out of it by now. This was probably the restaurant they took me to the most. I guess it had some perks besides the food, like building my arm muscles.

Now I place both my hands on the window and lift myself up ever so carefully so I don't lose my balance. Once my torso is up to the window I throw both of my legs over and finally slide out. Usually, it doesn't rain but apparently tonight it was and I land in a puddle making my bare feet wet. Well all of me was about to get wet anyway. Thankfully I landed on my feet, unlike the first couple of times I did this.