Josie's Journey

The Old Josie Can't Come To The Phone Right Now

The next morning, the sun shined brightly into her room, the light blue curtains were nearly see-through, but the sun always seemed to go through the material. The sound of her alarm woke her up and she groaned. She had school. She really didn't want to go and didn't feel up to it but she had just had a week off of school for a school break, so she couldn't stay home.

She rolled herself out of bed, shutting off her alarm, knocking it over off the nightstand. She huffed as she set it down on the bedside table. She felt sick, but she had to go. She took a deep breath and went to her closet, choosing an outfit; a long pair of jeans with a black shirt that had a symbol on it. She took her clothes with her to the bathroom, turning the shower on. She set them down on the counter and began to get undressed. She stepped into the warm shower.

All her thoughts began to swarm in her head as she sat on the floor, holding her knees close to her chest. All she could think about was the incident with Ethan. He was back home now and she already missed him and wished she could do more for him.

She heard a knock on her bathroom door and sighed, getting out of her head. "Yes?" She called out.

Her mother, Elaine, replied. "You're going to be late. Hurry up!" She said through the door.

Josie hadn't even washed her hair and she honestly didn't even care. She was too tired and weak to care. She finished up in the shower and got dressed quickly. She grabbed her shoes and her backpack, her phone in her pocket, then she went downstairs to put her shoes on.

She suddenly heard a voice again. Stay home. I don't feel good.

"What?" Josie whispered to herself. There was a voice again... different than the first though. It wasn't as comforting; it was anxious and needy. "I'm not staying home. I don't feel good, but I can do this."

Stay home, or I'll do it for us, the voice said.

"I don't..." Josie began. A slight headache quickly overtook her and stumbled to her bed. "I need... I have to lie down, I..."

Her eyes hyper-focused on the pattern of her blanket. She wasn't sure how long it was until she felt her vision slide out of focus.

I'll take good care of us, the voice said in a calm whisper. It was no longer just a voice, it was her voice. But now... who was she?

"I'll take good care of us," she repeated, out loud now, in a voice similar to her own but not quite the same.

She took out her phone and fired off a quick text to Elaine, mumbling out loud as she typed. "I can't go to school today - feeling sick, low blood pressure, headache. Don't worry I will be okay. I'll stay hydrated and rest."

She set her phone down beside her on the bed and rolled onto her back, laying down and staring at the ceiling. She didn't feel like herself anymore, she didn't feel like Josie. If she didn't know better, she'd think that she was a different person.

She got up from the bed and went into the bathroom, first washing her hands, then began to wash her face and add some moisturizer. She continued to get herself all cleaned up and ready for the day - she couldn't remember if she already had, so she decided it was better to just do it again and make sure she was nice and clean!

She caught a glance at her reflection in the mirror and frowned. "I'm not supposed to look like this..." she murmured.

She went back to the room and took her meds, nearly chugging the water down. She grabbed the glass and filled it from the faucet to get another drink. Once she finished, she went downstairs and bumped into her uncle.

"Hey Josie, you okay?" He asked.

She nodded and looked at him. "I'm fine."

He looked at her confused and worried. "You don't seem like yourself at all, Josie. Are you sick?" he asked. "You've got a different look in your eyes."

She just nodded and turned away, but he pulled her back gently.

"C'mon, don't you have time for your deal ol' Uncle Adam?" he teased, then ruffled her hair.

She looked up at him and struck up a conversation, then began cracking jokes. They spent a couple of hours watching Netflix and joking around together, just chilling on the couch in the living room. She propped her feet up to avoid the blood pooling in her legs and making her POTS symptoms even worse.

There was chaos in her mind. The living room isn't safe! Get us out of here Anna! She pushed the voices away though - she didn't have the time for them right now. It was finally time for her to have her own day.

After some time, she helped Adam make some lunch: grilled cheese sandwiches! She usually loved them, but lately, her stomach had bothered her. She watched as he brought them out to the living room and she began to eat, still watching the movie.

She finished eating, closing her eyes as she suddenly felt sick. Her stomach turned and she lurched forward for a moment. She got up and then Adam looked at her. "What's wrong, Josie?" he asked her.

She closed her eyes as he spoke. "Here, just head to the bathroom," he said gently. "I'll get you some water and a trash can after you're done. You look as pale as a ghost." He left the living room.

She dashed for the bathroom across the hall. Her blood pressure had dropped slightly and it was making her dizzy. She kneeled over the toilet and retched. When she was done, she washed her hands and rinsed out her mouth, then went to lay down in the living room again. No, it's not safe - but she ignored it again.

She got comfortable and used the remote for the TV to change the show to something different than Josie's used favorites. Her uncle had brought her water and a trash can as promised, and some ginger tea to calm her nausea. He'd left for work. So she was alone and a bit more comfortable after her stomach felt better.

After a while, she got bored, so she pulled out her phone and began to text Ethan. "Hey, are you home?" She sent the text. Then the call screen popped up so she answered it.

"Hi," she said blankly. Usually, she greeted him enthusiastically, with lots of questions about his day.

Ethan was confused. "You really don't sound like yourself. Your mom told me you're sick. What's going on? You sound like a completely different person. Who is this?" he asked.

She looked down. "Oh, it's Anna."