Every Rose has it's Thorn.

Chapter 3 - It's Over...

The Following Morning;
Shayne Ackles...

Last night hadn't gone as I intended, or even as I had imagined it ending. The fight with Jonah has only confirmed what I had been thinking for a while - and that was that it was over. We were no good for each other - that had never been more, clear than it had last night. I just couldn't continue with someone who would push my buttons so hard that I resorted to violence. I am not a violent person. I hate violence at the best of times, and none more than relationship violence.

Last night I had become something that I hated and with that came the resolution to end my relationship. It was time. Time to put distance between Jonah and me. Time to rebuild my life as a single woman and for that I needed to decide whether it was going to be done here in the home I had made for myself, or back home in Dallas where I had all of my family at my disposal. It wasn't a decision that I could make on a whim. I needed to really think it through because the wrong choice could very well mean the difference between me being happy and content or sad and restless for the rest of my life.

One thing I did know - I am no longer making decisions based on how I feel about a man. I had done that when I stayed here for Jonah; and look how that has ended! In a fucking complicated colossal mess of epic proportions.

That is why I have spent the majority of this morning packing up his shit. We are done and I just need him gone. I will not be forced to twist myself into the awful person I could feel myself becoming with him around. This wasn't working anymore, and I know if he thought about it hard enough, he would realise that too. We clearly were no good for each other and that wasn't going to change. I just wanted him gone so I was ensuring that I had everything that he owned packed up, I didn't want him finding excuses to have to come back here for anything. Once I had it all packed up, I placed everything out on the porch at the front of the house where he would see it when he got back.

I guess it was good that he stayed away last night - it gave him time to cool off and gave me the time to not only cool off but to make these decisions that had needed making. I hated the thought of hurting him because I had loved him at one point but last night had twisted our relationship into something ugly and I wouldn't settle for that. I couldn't settle for that. I deserved better and deep down, so did he.

Once I had placed his X-box into a plastic storage box and placed it with the rest of his things on the front porch, I locked the house up, placing the steel barricade-bar across the back of the door, so that if he even tried to unlock the door he wouldn't be able to get in, and repeated the action on the back door and double locked the French doors at the back of the house, then I grabbed my phone and dialled his number, "hey baby, I am just finishing breakfast with my family then I will be home," he answered as if nothing had happened last night.

I guess I shouldn't have really expected anything else because this was how we always dealt with our issues - by glossing over them until it felt like they weren't even a real issue. It was unhealthy and it wasn't something that I wanted for the rest of my life.

"Jonah, your things are on the porch at the front door. I have ensured to pack everything, so you won't need to come back here..."

"What are you talking about?" He chuckled nervously.

"We're done Jonah. This - whatever we had, it's over..."

"No - you can't-you don't mean that!"

"I do. I'm sorry Jonah but last night was the final call - I haven't been happy for a while and last night - well last night was - it turned me into someone I don't want to be and well that left me a lot of time to think and I just can't keep doing this...we both deserve better -,"