Today was the first day of the end of my life. Anne and I were sitting around having tea when the door opened. Charles walked in and smacked her upside the head for sitting around.
"Who do you think you are? Why are you so cru-" Charles p,sjoved me to the ground. Familiar pains surged through me. I felt myself shrinking inside myself again. No, I thought, but it was too late he had smacked me back in to my state of loneliness, despair. I screamed and ran away from him towards the door he grabbed my hair and slammed me in to the wall. I screamed in pain. He ounched my face and I had a bruise forming, I could feel it. He wrapped his hands around my throat and held me in a choke. I kicked my legs and I could not breathe. I could see Anne out of the corner of my eye she ran up behind him and smashed a vase on his head. Nothing happened but he turned on her. She ran but he caught her and began beating her. I could not move. My arm hurt so bad I was not sure if it was broken, I could not move. Eventually he let her go and she ran to the safety of the guesthouse where the work lived.
Charles grabbed a clumpful of my hair and dragged me in to the bedroom, I did not fight. I did not fight, I was done, my parents would not allow me to divorce so I would let myself die. Death is peaceful, life is hard. Charles smacked me and burned me and kicked me. I cried, I screamed, I sobbed. I slipped in to my dreams easily, that helped with the pain. Carlisle was waiting for. He was leaning against a tree smiling at me.
I ran over to him and he embraced me with open arms. He twirled me around and our lips met. I wrapped my hands in his hair and he hugged my waist to his. "I love you," I whispered to him in between kisses.
"I love you," Carlisle responded and I felt like I would explode with hapoiness, even if it was a dream. It was the first time he had said I love you in a dream.
"You saved me," I informed him.
His blonde hair shined and he was beautiful. I studied his angular face, well-defined cheekbones, warm amber eyes. I lost myself in his eyes. I was in a new place. All alone. I saw a small boy, he had my caramel hair but Charles's face and I sobbed. He had my warm brown eyes not Charles' eyes. He smiled at me and I waved. He blew me a kiss and I ran over to him but he was gone. Instead a small grave with a 2 on it. I watered the grave with my tears. Elephant tears, I floaded the meadow and drowned, only I didn't. The scenery changed again and I was by a stream. An intense feeling of depression hit me hard. I collected some small pebbles and loaded my pockets with them. I rolled in to the stream and took a large boulder with me. It kept me under and I breathed in the water suffocating me. I felt the scream of my lungs as water surged in. Time stood still as I watched my life flashed before my eyes. A small child running through the fields on the farm in Colombus. Older, moremature, helping my father on the farm, my first horseback ride, my broken leg, Carlisle, and abuse.
Song lyrics roared through my dream as I drowned. "So lay me down, let the only sound be the overflow, pockets full of stones."
I saw Carlisle's face for the longest amount of time.
"So lay me down, let the only sound be the overflowwwww"
A golden light and I was awake.
Weeks passed, same old, same old. Beatings, rapings, and more. But now I was vomitting. I leaned over the toilet sick and another wave passed through me. Anne helped me to the doctor. It was february of 1920 by now. I anxiously sat in wait as the doctor examined my blood tests and urine sample.
"Congratulations, Mrs. Evenson you are pregnant," the doctor informed me. Pregnant? No! I couldn't raise a child in that home with Charles! I wrappes my arms around my abdomen and caressed it.
"I will save you," I whispered to my baby.
Anne met me outside in the car, "Are you alright?"
I shook my head.
"Do tell what's wrong?" Anne asked anxiously.
"I'm pregnant," I whispered hoarse.
"No Charles," she began.
"Milwakee, Anne please help me," I begged her. She nodded her head and we started off to Milwakee, Wisconsin. The home of my cousins.
* * * *
"Esme!" My cousin greeted me.
"Leslie!" I exclaimed hugging her. "You have to help me."
I sat down and explained everything to her. I waved good-bye to Anne who drove back to Colombus, Ohio.
"No," Leslie whispered placing a hand against my abdomen. "It's a boy."
"How do you know?"
"Hope."
* * * *
Okay the song lyrics are from Florence and the Machine, What the Water Gave Me
I dont own anything just shared it
