Bodies Bound

Being Free Isn't Free

I laughed. I laughed and I laughed, and I laughed.

It was ironic.

A barrier that kept the one, the ONLY, sorcerer that had complete power over me, or any sort of power over me, from doing anything.
Everything was in my hands now.

Do I show them I'm good?

Do I kill them all...

Should I do to them what they've spent the past thousands of years doing to me? Should I torture them? Manipulate them? Make them desperate for any kind of a break? Then I should show them mercy, be kind to them, nurturing even. Then I could watch the little sparkle come back to their eyes just to rip it right fucking away again. Then I could rip them apart limb by limb. Like what they've done to me.

That sounded like a somewhat fair deal. After all that's all they've done to me, over and over and over and over. Torture me, annihilate any hope I have. And then there was Satoru. A naive, adorable, sweet little boy that took care of me from the moment he became self-aware. Then he took away what little hope and freedom he'd given me. He was just the same as any other damn sorcerer. How I could make him pay...

But did he really mean to use me the way that he did? 

Surely it could have been accidental. Why spend his whole life being nice to me just to start controlling me after all this time? That doesn't make any sense to me. Maybe he didn't mean it that way... maybe he didn't understand. There is no truth to my own memories. I'm ridden with anxiety, I'm beyond hateful, and extremely paranoid after countless years of this vicious cycle. He could have good intentions. He could be different.

Satoru has been trying to help me. He's been bettering me. He's been looking out for both my health and my safety. Sure he's commanded me like he swore he would never do, but either way, he did it for my own sake. Every screw up that has set off my trust in him has been purely my fault, he's merely been looking out for me.

Gods I can't believe I'm doing this...

I'll help him.
Only because it's him.
I'll help a sorcerer.

Everything was so much at once. So many thoughts in my head, so many sensations, sights, feelings. Everything was so raw, I was completely overwhelmed.

It was only when I stopped to calm my mind that I realized how much pain I was in.

I stretched out both of my hands in front of me. I could see them, not only could I see them perfectly but they were in perfect condition. Sure my skin felt like the blood underneath it was boiling, but I suddenly had all of my fingers again. I could feel the little scars all over my palms as they slowly closed and disappeared before my eyes.

My eyes. I could see...

I couldn't just make out fuzzy shapes as before, no, everything was crystal clear. My vision was completely restored.

I felt every wound in my body being fixed. The missing and broken bones in my body snapping right back into place, the skin on my back growing back, my body was slowly returning to its prime form.

Energy was filling my body so quickly it was like it was seeping out of my pores.
I felt like I was in my prime, back when there was peace...

Peace.

There's no time.

I need to find Yuuji. He was my only priority and I would protect him with anything I had, my husband was stuck with him, which meant he was the only thing that mattered to me.