Serendipity || Manjiro S.

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§ You're my Weakness §

*angst, at least i warned ya'll*

-Your POV-

I knew this would happen.... Yet why was it so... painful? I watched him cough up blood as i did nothing to help him instead i stood right beside the person who was about to kill him.. Fuck. Was it a mistake? Did i get myself tricked? Was this all part of Akio's plan?

Was trying to kill manjiro also a part of his plan?... If i never fed him the dorayaki... would things be different? Would i still be standing next to him and watching him sleep ever so comfortable next to me if i never did that? My plans never fail.... So why?...

Was it because i fell in love? Was it because i found another person to care for and yet.... And yet the world will also take him away from me too? Why? Why me? Why me out of all the people in the world... why me? Did i do something wrong? Did i not do my part as a daughter of a soldier? Did you not approve of my happiness that you had to take away everything i love?

Do i deserve such a punishment god? Do i? Why? Is my suffering not enough to satisfy your eagerness to make me suffer? I thought you love your children...?

Do you not love me? Am i not lovable? Am not your child as well?....

This world can be too much for humans honestly... those living in the slums lives happy but those live in luxury lives in sadness and sorrow.

Manjiro and i are victims of this cruel world... A person can only take so much, So why us? Do you not find us lovable god? Is this the punishment for humans who disobeyed you? What does that have to do with us? We never asked to be born in a world where we need to suffer!! So why are you putting it all on us when we never asked to be born in the first place!!!

If you were going to keep us alive then might as well give us a decent common life without killing and brutality! Do we not matter to you? Are we not enough? Why? Why us? Do we not deserve to be loved and care for? Do we deserve all this? What did we ever do wrong?

I did everything.... Isn't that why i'm trying to remove all the sinners and cruelty in this world? But why do you have to take even the people i care for?....

I watched everyone i love die in front of me.. Now who's next? Manjiro? You're going to take him too?! At least take me instead of making me feel this painful feeling in my heart... I can't breathe nor can i think straight, how do you expect me to live?...

Sitting in front of your parents grave you kept on flicking your lighter playing with the object as silence surrounded the graveyard staring at the lighter as you open and closed it repeatedly.

"Mom.... If.... If you were in my place... would you have.... Would you have made the same decision for dad?" You said sniffing as you wiped the tear that was about to fall down your cheek.

"Why does have to be me?.... Every single time... First you, then dad, then Shinichiro-san... now Mikey?.... Why me?" You murmured hugging your legs to your chest.

"Did i do something wrong?.. i guess that darn old lady was right... i will suffer a hard life." You smiled as you let the tears fall on your cheek nonstop, burying your face in your arms as you sobbed.