Innocent To Bold [On Hold]

16

Shivani

After a week…

As I was sensing, I got a mail from HOD from university regarding the allotting of our new supervisor. For that I need to go to the university.

I feel like crying, ok I’m crying. I’m not crying because I have to go to the university. I already set my mind to face it. Because that’s the reality. I’ve to face it anyhow. I’m crying because I have to go from here. Leaving Nikhil. Thousand miles away from him.

In these days, I’ve got so depend on him that now I think I won’t be able to function without him. Moreover, I’m going to miss the girls. And the shopping and adventure trip which we planned to go on next weekend. Literally, I’m having fomo.

I look at the time, Nikhil will be home soon. I quickly wash my face. I look at the mirror. My eyes become red because of crying.

*****

I’m avoiding Nikhil. Yes, he came from office. Before he came, I heated his food and placed it on table. He came, he freshened up and ate his food. I’m not exactly avoiding him; I’m talking to him but not face to face. Because my eyes are still red and puffy. I’m reading a book in balcony. And he is coming towards me with a serious look. God save me.

“Are you avoiding me? why didn’t you come to me when I came from office? leave that, why your eyes are puffy?” again my eyes start to become blurred.

“W…what happen Vani? Don’t scare me again.”

“Nothing happened. I got a mail from the department.” I stated the fact.

“Thank god. I thought something happened. Don’t scare me like this. Now tell me why did you cry?”

“I got a mail from the department.”

“Yes, you already told that. But why did you cry?”

“Because I got a mail from the department.” He isn’t getting my point. On other day he read my mind so easily like I’m transparent to him. But today he isn’t getting my simple sentence.

“Are you scared to go to university? If so, don’t. He won’t be there. There is nothing to be scared. I know you need time but you’ve to come out of that trauma, Vani.”

“Nikhil, I’m not scared of that. Even I’m not crying thinking about that.”

“Then why were you crying?” he is really an idiot. Why can’t he understand my feelings that I’m going to miss him. Very badly. I don’t want to go away from him.

“First I got a mail and second I need to go back to Mumbai.”

“Yes, I know that.” He shrugged.

“You know that. Ok, good for you. I need to use the bathroom. Excuse me.” he still hasn’t got the simplest meaning of my sentence, what I’m trying to tell him. Now, I’m feeling, the idiot one is me not him.

“No, you’re not excused.” He didn’t let me get up from the chair.

“Now what?” I rolled my eyes.

“You won’t say it, right?” I saw a smirk on his face.

“What?”

“That you’re going to miss me, wifey. I was waiting for you to tell me directly but you didn’t. You know what, you’re so stubborn. You want me to tell you first, right? Then listen.” He came closer to me resting his forehead on mine. Our noses were touching. He took a deep breath then lean back and cupped my face. Now he is looking at me with an adoration. I want to pause this moment for forever.