Behind Castle Walls (Completed)

Chapter Twelve.

Dean's POV:

Pain. Isn't that the feeling? It sure hurt like hell but was it really pain or was it all in my head? I'm a wrestler. I've taken numerous hits to the face, the torso, everywhere. I've been through barbed wire, glass, been cut with knives, bar fights, guitars, baseball bats, barbed wire bats, curling irons (it's a long story) and I've sewed my nipple back on before by hand after it was torn off in a Deathmatch (intense hardcore matches).

I've been abused verbally, emotionally, physically by be any guy my mother was banging that week or by my mother herself. I was jumped walking down streets as a kid. I was bullied until I try to shove a caramel apple stick down a kid's throat. I didn't make the baseball team so I took the baseball bat and beat the shit out of this one little boy, who struck me out on purpose so I wouldn't make his stupid little team. I've seen my mother get the shit beaten out of her and knocked unconscious over drugs. I've sat and watched these men rape her continuously for hours and I say rape because she was too strung out to defend herself.

Life for me was never pretty. It was never sugar coated and it wasn't ravishing but it was mine. It was my life and I dealt with it because I needed to survive. I've seen pain, I've felt pain, so I guess I'm pretty use to it. I've seen so much of that and more and it's hurt me to the core of what's left of my aching soul.

But nothing, and I do mean nothing, hurt worse than seeing Renee making out with Nick.

It wasn't more than what I visioned though. When I saw them kissing, it wasn't a sloppy make out where they look like they're about to rip each other's clothes off, what I call, the fun kissing. They didn't look as if they were going to have sex right here in the middle of the locker room. It was pretty innocent actually.

But once I saw them, that's what I pictured in my mind.

They weren't laughing in the middle of it and his hands weren't roaming her body. In fact, they were in an innocent place. On the small of her back, not her ass. Not like how I kiss. They kissed for simple passion and when I kissed someone, it was for hunger. I don't kiss anyone just to kiss them. Usually, I want something but with Renee, it would've been different.

It could've been different....I'm such an idiot.

I could have been hers and she could've been mine but no, I fucked it up. My fear of commitment and love and all the junk that comes with it led me here. In this door way watching Renee, MY Renee, in the arms of Nick Nemeth, who'd I never had a problem with until he tried to ease his way in Renee's life. Particularly, her panties.

But I'm not suppose to talk about that right?

Well, I will. Nick is just like any superstar here trying to get laid. Nick claims not to be a player like his character but even I am not that good of an actor. I'm going to find something on this guy.

Even if it kills me.

God, I sound like a psychopath.

"Jon? Are you okay? Say something, you're scaring me." Renee pleaded.

Oh right, words. I cleared my throat, "I uhh, um, you're debut is tomorrow. Like I talked with Trips and Steph and they agreed it'd be perfect timing or whatever so. I guess I'll just like go now that I've told you that. So yeah."

I closed the door quickly before she said anything to try and stop me.

I regretted that as soon as I heard that familiar shrill of a voice, "Where were you last night? I was waiting for you."

I stood eye to eye with Danielle, or as you know her as, Summer Rae then glanced around for an escape route.

"I can't with right now, Danielle. I'm busy."

"Busy in Paige's locker room when she's out in the ring? Sounds sketchy. Are you that mystery guy she's crazy about?"

"What? No. That's Jericho." Shit, was I suppose reveal that? God, I sure hope it isn't a big deal.

"Whatever, this isn't about her. This is about you texting me yesterday. You talked heavy in dirty words and convinced me to come to your room so I did and-"

"Don't you ever shut up? I know what I did. I know what I said but I got caught up in something. Renee wanted me to stay with her and so I did."

"Your weird relationship that's not even an official relationship is so complicated. I can't sleep with you until you figure out what it is you have with Renee."

"God, Danielle. I asked you to fuck once and you flip out. Like relax. Now if you excuse me, I have IC title to win."

Long story short, my Wrestlemania moment didn't happen. It was the dumbest thing I swear and at the end of the IC ladder match, the one I fucking started, Daniel Bryan stood on top of the ladder with my championship. I couldn't help but stare at the clouds above, since we were outside. I took a nasty fall thanks to Luke Harper tossing me into a ladder that was on the ground of the outside. Well. That was unexpected.

After finishing my Road to Wrestlemania video in the trainers office, I sat in my locker room until Mania was over. That little weasel Rollins won the championship at the end of the night instead of Ro. As much as I hate to admit it, he deserves it. He's worked ass off for it.

"Way to go, brother." I said out loud as if he was standing in front of me.

They put the camera on Roman's shocked expression and I spoke again, "Get em' next time brother."

I jumped when I heard a buzzing noise then snatched my phone out of my pocket. I stared at the name that flashed across the screen on my phone and let it vibrate in my hand. There's no way I'm answering. Nope, not gonna.

I shoved the phone back in my pocket, grabbed my bag, and left the locker room.

Somehow, I ended up speeding and swerving down the road as I drank my tenth beer. I felt like I can fly and if I die, maybe WWE can shove it and use it as a damn storyline. Maybe then I'll get the push I worked so damn hard for. Maybe they'll bury every single championship with me. Lord knows I deserve it. I suddenly swerved and the car spun around in a circle. I shoved the door open and quickly stumbled out of it.

"CARRY ON MY WAYWARD SON! THERE'LL BE PEACE WHEN WE ARE DONE! LAY YOUR WEARY HEAD TO REST! DONT YOU CRY NO MORE! AHHHHHHHH!" I sang loud and obnoxiously as the everything sort of spun around. Man, I love being drunk.

I climbed on top of the car, "I JUST WANT EVERYONE HERE TO KNOW THAT I, DE-" I stopped then shook my head, "I, JONATHAN LEE GOOD, AM IN LOVE! YEAH THATS RIGHT! IM IN LOVE WITH RENEE PAQUETTE! BUT YOU MAY KNOW HER AS RENEE YOUNG."

I hopped off the car and grabbed another bottle from my car. I strolled over to the bridge and looked over it then carefully got in position to sit on the edge. I drank some more and started rambling to myself.

"And I've always been. I always will be and the thought of Nick trying to take her away....Renee has this, like, light about her or whatever. When she walks into a room, the whole world stops. She's got this laugh that makes you laugh because it's just so fucking cute. Her blonde hair makes her angelic. Her voice is so soothing and calming. When she's angry, her nose wrinkles up and she's even cute then. I'm so in love with her. I'm such a sap right now rambling on and on, on a bridge drunk outta my mind. And talking to myself? Sheesh. I'm such a sad case..."

"Tonight, I lost my IC title. I wanted so desperately. I just wanted to have a Wrestlemania moment and win a pay per view. Is that good enough? It isn't. I lose again. Tonight, I lost Renee to Nick because I'm an idiot. I lose everything...I don't know what's the point anymore.."

I looked down again and started swinging my legs back and forth, "I wonder if I can swim...let's see."

That's when I stood on the rail of the bridge and stared below me..
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Total cliffhanger!

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