Past is set in stone, only your feelings may change

Reincarnation

Wei Wuxian was looking into Lan Zhan's eyes. They usually were cold towards him, or angry when he teased, or distant when he refused to let himself be lead back to the rightful path – not that there was any saving him from demonic cultivation when he did not have a golden core anymore – or worried, that actually happened most of the time. Just like right now.

He was looking up at the boy – not a boy anymore, a man now - whom he had once followed everywhere around the Cloud Recesses and would not let himself be deterred by anything, whom he had tried to distance himself from during the Sunshot campaign but failed quite spectacularly, who risked his life just now to protect him from sword strikes. He did not know why he could not let of Lan Zhan even when he had thought that it would have been wiser to do so. Why did Lan Zhan follow him after he had come back from the Burial Mounds?

He almost chuckled, their roles seemed reversed now, instead of him chasing after Lan Zhan, it was the Second Jade who would not leave him in peace with his demonic cultivation.

Those eyes were so deep right now that Wei Wuxian would swear he could see deep into Lan Zhan's soul. Only, what he saw there, he could not understand it at all. And he did not have been given any time to examine those swirling emotions deeper.

Suddenly, his eyes were drawn to a motion in the corner of his vision. He looked that way, afraid that perhaps some cultivator was now after Lan Zhan because he was helping the Yiling Patriarch out in the open for everyone to see. Surely they would label him as a criminal as well.

Or perhaps not, Wei Wuxian let out the breath he did not realize he had been holding, Lan Zhan was their Hanguang-Jun, the one who was always where the chaos reigned, the most righteous of them all. No one would dare to stand against him. That was good, Wei Wuxian was relieved.

Only until he realized that he was looking into another pair of familiar eyes. He was not confused about the emotions hidden in those orbs. He had had a long time to practice seeing just that. Jiang Cheng was angry, no, more like furious. He was holding his sword and its tip was pointed at Wei Wuxian.

That was it, Wei Wuxian thought, now he would die for not keeping his promises of always standing by his family and not being able to keep his sister safe. He might have as well been the one to kill her, she had run onto the battlefield because of him. He knew Jiang Cheng was thinking the same thing.

If it would make at least a tiny bit of pain go from his brother's heart, Wei Wuxian would not mind dying by his hand. He was at peace with himself. He had finally managed to destroy his biggest mistake, the Strygian tiger seal, he had nothing more he could do. Although he still wanted to go back to A-Yuan, he knew only too well that it was not possible anymore. He was going to die here.

Then, Jiang Cheng stuck the rock under Lan Zhan and Wei Wuxian's heart stopped beating at once. No! He could not let Lan Zhan die because of him as well. Jiang Yanli had been already one too many lives lost on his account.

He snapped his hand away from Lan Zhan's and he was falling. He kept gazing into those shocked golden eyes until he memorized them to the last detail. After that, he closed his own eyes, waiting for the death to take him.

It did not even take a second, or that was what it felt like, and he opened his eyes again, immediately blinded by the sunshine coming in through an open door. A kick to his chest made him fall onto hard ground. He rolled away by instinct. If he was not dreaming this, there was only one other explanation: he was in the world of the living again. What was he doing here?