Chapter 27

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Amanda

"What are you thinking Tamara, what's going on?" malumanay niyang tanong sa kanyang pasyente. She's getting better based on her findings and observations. Masaya siyang makatulong sa kanila ni Al. They deserve to be really happy after everything they been through.

"I'm scared to touch my daughter."

"Okay go on Tam." pag papatuloy niya rito nang hindi na ito nag salita.

"It's disgusting." hindi ito makatingin sa kanya ng deretso.

"I see." tipid na sagot niya. Ayaw niya itong pangunahan sa kung ano man ang nais nitong sabihin.

"It's not about my-my child."

"It's me. I'm disgusted to myself." pinahid nito ang luha sa kanyang mata. Tumango lang si Amanda.

"Whenever you touch her what do you feel?" Tamara smiled sadly.

"I- I feel sorry for her."

"But I felt it. She came from me.".

"She's a victim like I am."

"Tam, what you've experienced will never define who you are. Never ever be. You did you're best to protect her and you're wonderful."

"No, I will never be a good mother to her."

"Every time I stare at her I remember those times, how stupid and weak I am." naiintindihan niyang malaking trauma talaga ang naranasan nito.

"Do you have it in your heart the urge to try?"

"Of course. I just don't know how to and when to."

"Okay how about we do this. I'll mirror whatever you will say and we'll take turns alright?" tumango naman ito sa kanya.

"I am weak and- ashamed of myself." nahihirapan man ay nagpatuloy si Tamara.

"I am weak and ashamed of myself." pag ulit naman ni Amanda.

"I wanted to start anew but I'm reminded of everything whenever I looked at her."

"Okay Tamara it's my turn."

"I did everything in my power to save us from that situation." Amanda said with firm conviction.

"I-did... Everything in my power to save us from that situation."

"My child will be a reminder of hope and courage that we've been through." Tamara did not stammer in this phrase, Amanda smiled at her urging her to continue.

"To start a new, I must let it all go."

As we see, words are really powerful. Every single phrase can change a thing. Sometimes we really must have to keep holding even in the tiniest of hope, because we really never know what's around the corner.

After the session ay nag paalam na ito sa kanya at sinundo naman ito ng tauhan ni Al. Masyado na itong naparanoid sa nangyari. She needs counselling too, pero mas dapat pagtuunan ngayon ay si Tamara.
She decided to give Charlie a call to check on her.
Siguro naman hindi ito gaano ka busy ngayon and it's lunch time.

"Hey baby, have you eaten already?" tanong ni Amanda sa kabilang linya.

"Yep. done." tipid na sagot lang sa kanya ni Charlie. Hindi manlang ito nag abalang tanungin din siya. Siguro galit pa ito sa kanya. But she promised to make it up to her.

"That's nice. Did you liked it?" tukoy niya sa pinadeliver nitong bulaklak at lunch.

"Thanks by the way."

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