New Rules

9

Music blares into your ears as your feet pound the pavement below. All the built-up stress is getting to you making you feel like you're going to explode. You needed space just for a moment to think without everyone's opinions. Martha and Grey are pissed that Alex didn't celebrate your birthday with you. You didn't even tell Tara in fear of what she might say or do. All the while Alexander's words screamed through your mind.

Making your way to the house you jog inside running up the stairs heading towards the shower. Opening the door you noticed Alex sitting up in bed looking around having just woken up. She smiles when she sees you her mouth moving but you couldn't hear over your music. You pulled the air pods from your ears "What?" you asked. "I said good morning." she chuckles. "Morning." you smile heading towards the dresser to grab fresh clothes. "You go for a run this morning?" she asked. You nod "yup." Feeling her arms wrap around your waist you jump. She chuckles " Sorry. Didn't mean to scare you." "it's fine," you mumbled looking for your shorts. "Can I have a kiss? " she asked. Grabbing your shorts you turn in her arms giving her a quick kiss. "I'm going to shower," you tell her. She smiles "Can I join you?" she asked with a smile.  "I'm not really in the mood right now. I just want a quick shower to wash off," you tell her heading into the bathroom closing the door behind you. "Okay," she mumbles confusedly.

Once you were in the safety of the shower you let it out. Tears mixed with the warm water as you tried to quietly sob. Once you were done you walk out in your rob seeing Alex on the bed. She looks up at you her eyes filled with tears. "Yesterday was your birthday," she whispered. You nod your head " Yeah it was." you say walking over to your side of the bed to get dressed. "I'm so sorry my love. I didn't even realize I slept through the day until I looked at my phone. " she cries. "It's fine Alex. No big deal," you mumbled pulling up your shorts.  She turns to face you " If I get dressed now we can head out for breakfast." she says. "I can't. I have to meet with Tara to go over some lesson plans," you explain. "Oh. Well, when you get back we can get dressed and do something." she offers. "Really Alex it's cool. You were exhausted and it's just a day. Not a big deal." you tell her grabbing your bag. Walking past her she grabs your hand "y/n, please. I'm so sorry." she cries. Leaning down you give her a quick kiss " Don't be. I'll be back in an hour." you tell her walking out the room. Alex sighs as she drops back down on the bed. "I'm fucking it all up." she cries. "Goddammit!" she screams getting up walking into the closet.  After looking around she finally finds it sinking down to the floor she lifts her shorts just enough to expose her inner thigh. Bringing the flame closer until it hits the skin melting a layer away. She gasped at first before letting out a deep breath. Pulling the lighter back she slams her back against the wall sobbing.

After an hour of trying to convince Tara, you were fine you were happy to be home. Alex is around the corner before you can even shut the door to greet you.  "Hi." she smiles. "Hi." you smile back hanging up your coat and bag. "Listen I know you said it's not a big deal but it is to me. I am extremely sorry that I missed your birthday. And I feel awful. I know you said you didn't really want to go out today but I do have a gift for you. I ordered it months ago and I was going to give it to you on your birthday." she says handing you a small box. You sigh "Alex you don't..." "Just open it, please." she pleads cutting you off.  Looking down you open the box to find a gold charm bracelet. "I already had some charms made. But you can always add more. The A is for Alex, there's an apple for two reasons one because we met here in New York and two because you're a teacher, the long bar as the date of our first kiss printed on it, there's a snail for our first date, and  the two hearts have a k and t in them for tara and momma k." she explains. 

You look up at her with a watery smile "Thank you." She smiles "You like it?" she asked. "I do," you say nodding your head. "Good. I'm glad," she says. "Alex I love you and I love your gift. I really do. I know you're sorry for missing my birthday. And I understand how exhausted you were when you got home. I tried to play it off like it doesn't bother me but it does. I spent all day with people telling me happy birthday, giving me gifts, Martha made me breakfast and dinner and hell Grey even bought me my favorite coffee. It was a good day. And I felt awful for being upset because they went out of their way to celebrate with me. But the only person I wanted to spend time with was you. I waited all day for you to get here Friday only for you to show up hours late. Then you slept the entire day away. I know you work hard and I love that. But I have bent over backward to make this work. I've asked over and over for you to take it slow.  To keep your father at bay and I'm getting tired of asking. Maybe your dad is right. " you sighed. "Wait what do you mean maybe he right?" she asked. "It doesn't matter." you sighed walking past her. She glides in front of you blocking your path "What did he say?" she asked.

You sighed shaking your head taking a deep breath before you speak " He said that he wanted what was best for you. That if I truly loved you maybe I should ask myself if I'm what's best for you," you explain. "And you believe him?" she asked.  You shrugged your shoulders "I don't know Alex. He said that you needed to be able to focus on this firm and clearly, I'm distracting you from that." you sighed. "I am focused! If anything I've been too focused on this firm. He's wrong!" she says. "While that may be true he is right about one thing," you tell her. She waits for you to continue you sighed " Alex I don't bring anything to our table. I can't offer you anything. Take this bracelet for example I love it and it's beautiful. But I can't buy you one, I would have to save months in advance to pull something like this off." you tell her. "I don't care about that! I brought you that because I wanted to and I wanted you to have something nice. You deserve it. I didn't buy it expecting something in return."  "I can't offer you anything, Alex. " you cried out cutting off her words.

Alex shakes her head tugging you to the living room. She sits down offering you the seat next to her. "Look at me," she whispered. You sigh looking up. "I love you. You say you can't offer me anything but that's a lie. What you bring to the table is far more important than money and gifts. You bring me stability, happiness, love... Those are important things that you offer me. What my dad said is wrong. And I will be having a talk with him. But right now I'm more concerned about you. So as of today and tomorrow, I am unplugged from the rest of the world. I already sent my report to my dad while waiting at the airport. There is no reason for me to be there tomorrow. However, there is a reason for me to be here. I love you so much y/n and I don't think you realize just how much you mean to me." she confesses tears running down her face. You cry harder as your eyes meet moving over to straddle her lap you lean in to kiss her. "I love you so much." you whimpered against her lips.  "I love you too. I adore you, my love. I need you." she whispered. You cry together as you hide your face in her neck hers in your shoulder holding on to each other as if you feared the other would disappear if you let go.

Alex barely lets you out of sight for the rest of day always finding a reason to touch you, hold you, or kiss you. That night she ran a hot bath for the two of you. Cleaning your body as she sat behind you. After that the two of you made love. It's weird though normally Alex loves for you to go down on her. However, tonight as you made a trail down her body she tugs you up saying she doesn't want that.  She'd much rather you stay with her. You didn't think much of it but maybe you should have. Maybe if you did Alex wouldn't be in the closet right now burning her thigh as you lay in bed asleep.