Too Good to be Bad | Negan |

31 - You want me to stay?

I'm not sure how long I've been in here. There's no light, no sounds, nothing that gives any indication as to how much time has passed. Eventually I stopped crying, but with the horrors of my nightmares so fresh in my mind I just couldn't get myself to calm down in the dark. I kept imagining Ramon stepping out of the shadows, grabbing me, pulling his knife on me. Nothing happened of course, but by the time the door finally opens, I'm completely worn out.

'Fucking hell', I hear a familiar voice mutter. The light flicks on and I blink against the sudden brightness. Negan's standing in the doorway, looking at me with a deep frown on his face. For a moment I think he's mad at me. But then he crouches down before me and immediately starts to take the chain off my ankle.

'They didn't tell me until just now. I came straight down here.'

The chains come off and Negan takes my face into his hands.

'I am so sorry.' The worry is clear in his dark eyes as he takes me in. I start to cry again and he pulls me up and hugs me against him. I lean into him and let the tears flow.

'It's okay', he says softly, stroking my back. 'You're okay.'

'No, I'm not', I sob. 'I'm not okay. I can't sleep. I always see their faces.'

'They can't hurt you.'

'I know that. I don't know why this keeps happening.'

'Let's get out of here, okay? I'll take you back to your room.'

I've calmed down a little and I follow Negan back to my room. I'm glad to leave this dark hellhole behind me. I don't know how Kieran lasted so long in there. The hallways are empty, so it must still be early. I'm glad for it, I don't want anyone to see me like this.

I don't speak while we walk and neither does Negan, though he keeps throwing me worried glances. I don't look back. All I focus on is getting back to my room and not breaking down again. Finally we're there and Negan tells me I should get some more rest. I change into my leggings and long-sleeve and I get under the covers but I don't intend to sleep again. I pull my knees up and lean against the wall, giving Negan space to sit down on my bed too.

'So what happened?' he asks finally.

'I just had a bad dream', I answer, not meeting his eye. I'm tired of being so weak in front of him the whole time. I must seem like a lunatic with all my crazy dreams.

'But how did you end up in the library?'

'I don't know. When I came back to my room last night I just fell straight asleep. I haven't really been sleeping well since I moved here, I was exhausted. I guess I forgot to lock the door and then I had a bloody night terror again.'

'That dream took you all the way over there?'

'I suppose. I woke up when I knocked over the bookcase.' I look up to see him frowning at me. 'Don't you believe me?' I ask him quietly.

'I believe you, sweetheart', he says, running his hand over my cheek. 'I'm just worried about you. I've never seen anything like this.'

'I'm very special.'

He smiles and lets his hand drop onto my knee.

'That you are. Why did you start to sleep alone if your dreams are that bad?'

I shrug. 'Alex would have never asked me to leave, but him and Max deserve to be together. I can't get in between that. And I can handle it. I just have to get used to it.'

'You didn't want to sleep with Priya? Or Mac Douche?'

I snigger shortly. Negan still isn't exactly a fan of Kieran.