Too Good to be Bad | Negan |

69 - I'm not fucking all right

I enter the Hilltop at Jesus's side. There are bodies strewn across the ground. I swallow when I recognize some of them. I don't know most Saviors well, but I've met a lot of people at the Sanctuary, drawing my portraits. I've had conversations with some of these men.

A group of people runs towards us, led by a woman holding a rifle on me.

'Who's this?' she asks Jesus, not taking her eyes off me.

'This is Lara. She shot Simon and got Dwight to end the attack. You can lower the rifle, Maggie.'

Maggie? So this must be the Widow. She doesn't lower her rifle.

'You killed Simon?'

'I tried. But last I saw he was still alive.'

'Who are you?' she asks confused.

'You're supposed to be dead', another voice says behind me. I look around and see Rick coming up to us.

'So I hear.'

'Negan said you were dead', Rick says, looking at me suspiciously. 'He thought we killed you. He came for Alexandria, he destroyed everything.'

I look sideways at Jesus who frowns as he takes in the news. So we're too late.

'She wanted to warn you', Jesus tells him, pushing Maggie's rifle down because she still won't take it off me. 'This was Simon's doing. He wanted to kill her to piss Negan off.'

'Why?' Maggie asks. I don't really like the look in her eyes. She clearly doesn't trust me. 'What are you to Negan?'

'It's a long story', I mumble. After everything that's happened I feel completely worn out. I don't know if I can tell the whole story again, my mind feels numb.

'I'll explain', Jesus says. 'Lara told me everything.'

I look at him with gratitude in my eyes, but before I can thank him, my eye falls on a group of people leaving the large house at the top of the hill. I recognize several of them, but only one gets my full attention. Ignoring Rick and Maggie's protests I run straight for him.

'Kieran', I say softly as I throw my arms around him. He stands in shock for a moment before he wraps his arms tightly around me.

'Lara, they told me you were-'

'Dead? Yeah, I know. Simon lied. He tried to kill me but I got away. I shot him.'

'You shot Simon?' he asks confused.

'Traitor bitch', someone mumbles behind him. I look over Kieran's shoulder and look straight into Jared's smug face. Suddenly everything that happened from the moment those walkers broke through the walls of the Sanctuary brings out an unquenchable rage in me. I let go of Kieran and without warning I jump at Jared. I couldn't kill Simon, but maybe I can kill him. I push him to the ground and punch his stupid face until blood spurts from his nose. He's probably stronger than me, but he didn't expect me to come for him and he doesn't react until my third or fourth blow. Then he punches me back and I feel my tooth break my lip. I taste blood, but I don't care. I raise my fist to punch him again, but before I can, somebody grabs my arms and pulls me off of him.

'Stop it, Lara', Kieran says urgently. I try to break free from him, but he holds me tightly. Jared moans on the ground as he grabs his nose. A woman with a tight bun in her blond hair aims her gun at me, looking a little confused.

'It's okay, Diane', Jesus says. He runs over with Rick, Maggie and the others. 'She's with us.'

I stop struggling and stand limply in Kieran's arms to watch Jared struggle back to his feet. The other Saviors just keep their distance and look on in silence.