Too Good to be Bad | Negan |

38 - I've ruined everything

The morning alarm goes off and it hurts my head. I feel a little dizzy with all that gin still in my system. Kieran's grunting indicates he feels the same. I press my hands against my ears as I wait for the noise to pass. Fortunately, I don't have to get up, since it's Saturday. I'll definitively need some more sleep. Finally, it's quiet again. I turn my face to look at Kieran. He's got his eyes closed and rubs his temple.

'Morning', I say.

He finally opens his eyes and smiles at me.

'Morning.'

I smile back and we look at each other for a moment. I'm not sure what to do. Should I kiss him? Can I? Does he regret what we've done? Or is he happy about it? Everything felt so right yesterday, but the effects of the alcohol have worn off and now I'm not sure how to be around my friend. Clearly, Kieran feels the same.

'This is a bit strange, isn't it?' he says, grinning a little awkwardly.

'A bit, yes', I laugh. I bite my lip as my eyes find his mouth. He follows my gaze and smiles. Then he kisses me. My heart flutters as he does. I wish we could stay here all day, but unfortunately he breaks off our kiss.

'I don't mean to bail, but I have to get to work...' he says.

'Of course, I know. No problem.'

'We should probably talk about this. Later. Right?' he asks as he runs his thumb over my cheek.

'Yes. Probably.'

'I mean, this is huge. Isn't it? We can't just... We have to talk about it', he says awkwardly.

'Yes', I laugh. 'We'll talk about it. Come see me after you're done?'

'Yes. I'll catch you before dinner. Around 5?'

'Sounds good.'

He looks at me for a moment and grins. Then he kisses me one more time before he gets out of the bed and picks up his clothes. I pull the covers up and get comfortable again as I watch him do it.

'You have a nice day off, miss Pierce', he says as he pulls up his jeans. 'Don't you worry about us common folks, slaving away.'

I laugh. 'Think you'll survive?'

'Let's hope so.'

When he has all his clothes on, he hovers in the middle of the room. Clearly he's not quite sure what to do with himself. Or with me. I'm not sure either. Where will this go? But I can't worry about that right now, the scent of him still on me.

'So, I'll be off then. Gonna have a shower. In my room.' He points in the direction of his room awkwardly, making me laugh again.

'Good luck today.'

He scratches his head as he watches me. Seems like he's thinking about something. Finally he takes a couple strides over to me and kisses me.

'Bye', he says. A large smile appearing on his face all of a sudden.

'Bye', I say, grinning too.

Then he turns around and leaves the room, leaving me smiling in the bed.

---

I stay in bed for a couple more hours to sleep off my hangover before I get up to start the day. I have an appointment to draw a portrait in the afternoon, but I don't have anything planned in the morning, so I decide to hang out in the school to get my mind off things. Pri got bored taking care of the baby fulltime so she started going to the school again to help Max out. Taking Karishma with her, of course.

I help her out a little here and there as Max teaches the class about basic survival skills. Of course, I can't really focus on anything because my mind keeps going back to last night. Priya asks me a couple of times what on earth I'm smiling about all the time, but I don't tell her anything yet. We should talk about it together first. Negan's outburst creeps into my mind at times too, but I try not to think about it too much. He only proved that I was right to have doubts.