The Finding Tree

Chapter 7 - The Rain

The summer was going by quickly and Janey spent every spare moment she could at her tree.

Daddy was quiet and mama was preoccupied by something. She was on the phone more often, and was distant to both Janey and Tom. Janey knew something was off, she could sense it. The knot in her stomach ached when she was around both of her parents too often. She could feel tension and strain when Marcie wasn't herself.

The tree heard all about Janey's troubles. She talked to it daily, and started keeping a small box of toys under the bench. None of them disappeared like the gifts she had brought. Sometimes Janey wondered if they would. Perhaps it was a squirrel or raccoon that made her think the tree was really her friend.

But the tree never took her toys. It only accepted what she willingly gave. Janey had been taught by her parents at a young age, you can't buy love with gifts so she hadn't given anything other than the marble and the dog so far.

At eleven, she was part of her parent's social circle more often. Every weekend there were boats and people and kids covered in sunscreen. Janey saw how the cliques were forming. The ladies helping Marcie in the kitchen and laughing with her over coffee, would also whisper to each other on the dock. How sad it was that she was stuck out here every summer with no help. Poor Marcie was saddled with a kid and an alcoholic husband. Maybe we should take up donations, followed by laughter and wine coolers.

She saw Tom welcome the men that visited. They'd sit on the porch and pour bourbon in tumblers and play cards and even go fishing or water skiing some afternoons.

They'd thump him on the back and say how they loved his work at the studio, and how creative and successful he was. Then she heard them talk later when Tom wasn't around, about when would he give up and go on another bender. Could the partners buy him out? He was a liability to the company, everyone said it, it was just a matter of time til he imploded.

Sometimes she'd watch in awe as the sleek speedboats revved across the lake, bringing water skiers right to the dock. The boats were colorful, and looked like jets with massive engines on the back. You could hear the roar from miles away. All the children and women laughed and clapped, as a skier would coast to the dock, sinking slowly into the water. Janey watched the huge rooster tails of spray land on the water behind and then disappear like it had never been disturbed.

That's all it was, ripples on the water, returning to nothing.

The longer the tension lasted at home, the more Janey felt empty. The summer was almost over when the piano wire that was holding them all together snapped and everything fell apart.

***

"Janey, Janey honey... wake up."

It was three in the morning, and Marcie was in Janey's room, gathering clothes out of the closet and throwing them in a dufffle bag, a backpack at her feet.

Marcie's voice was soft, and urgent, quiet and forcefully calm. That was the scariest voice she ever used. Yelling was scary, but soft and calm was worse.

"Mama?" Janey struggled awake, sitting up and swaying. Trying to wipe the sleep from her head.

"Get up Janey-bug. Get dressed. I need you to listen to me now. I need you to put on these clothes, no don't get undressed, just put on your jeans, and sweater right over your nightgown. Here are some socks, and your sneakers are by the bed."

"Here's a flashlight, I want you to go to that place you always go, to the big tree in the woods. You go there and you wait for me, you hear?" Marcie handed her a backpack full of clothes, books and a blanket. There was a water bottle in the side pocket and Janey could hear the crinkle of a few granola bars.

"Mama, what's goin' on?" Janey's terrified whisper fell flat in the room. Her heart was slapping in her chest trying to choke her from the inside out.

"Please just do as I say, no questions now okay?"

Janey was trembling, as she pulled her pants up and tied her shoes. She was close to ready when she heard thrashing and tumbling down the hall.

The voice of her nightmares echoed down and she froze.

"MAARCIE!! Don't you do it...you bitch! I'll take her and run. You'll never see her again if you leave...you think you can run from me and just take my daughter? I know people and don't think I won't do it. I can...I survived two tours in 'nam, I can damn well survive you!

"Run Janey..." Marcies' urgent voice cut through Janey's fear.

Janey took off down the hall. But Tom caught her and held her tight against his booze saturated shirt. Janey choked on the stench and felt bile in her throat.

"You fucking bitch," he bit out toward Marcie. "You've turned her against me haven't you. Fine, go ahead and poison my daughter against me. You don't love me...you told me so yourself. But did you really have to go and do this?"

"I don't know Tom," Marcie hissed, "You seem to be doing a pretty good job of that all by yourself."

Tom slopped a kiss on Janey's forehead while she shrank and cringed away from him. The stench of sweat, anger, sadness and whiskey permeated the air around him like a weapon.

"You're the only one who loves me Janey. Don't you believe your mother's lies, she's a WHORE!" Tom squeezed Janey's shoulder into his body and smiled down at her with the unwavering righteousness of a drunk.

Tom swayed, turned to Marcie and spat at her, hitting her on the cheek with flying spittle. He let out a triumphant roar, still holding Janey hostage in one arm.

Marcie gasped and winced, wiping her cheek with the sleeve of her blouse. She turned to face him, her face flushed, but her hands steady.

His voice ratcheted up as he held his daughter close and looked down at her blurry form as they stood in the doorway. He slurred out words to her like she was a confidant on a bar stool, not his terrified child.

"Did you know your mother has been having an affair, Janey? She's been stepping out on me for over six months now, and with who? Fucking Richard at the Country Club...what could she ever see in that prick, huh Janey?"

Tom released her, and she froze, looking from one parent to the other. The tracks of her tears leaving shiny trails on her cheeks.

"That's right Janey-bug," Tom laughed maniacally, and randomly lunged for Marcie who calmly backed away. She looked at Tom with a strain of pure hatred Janey had never seen before. In that moment she saw there was nothing left, and knew life as it was, was over.

"This bitch right here has been two-timing me while I've been trying my damnedest to get my shit together and be a good family man."

"Right," Marcie snorted, while still folding Janey's clothes in the bag. "Drinking in your office and not talking to me for almost a year is 'trying to get your shit together'."

Marcie sighed, and dropped the floral burgundy dress she was folding up in the duffle bag. She ran a hand over her eyes and looked up. Anger, sorrow and resentment filled the face Janey loved, leaving no room for her daughter. "This marriage was over a long time ago, Tom. I was just too stupid to realize it."

Marcie glanced over at Janey savagely, hissed. "How many times do I have to say it Janey, GET OUT of here!"

Janey ran.

Tom tried to grab for her, but missed, and he stumbled, thudding against the door frame and sliding down to the floor in a slow motion collapse.

"Janey don't go, don't leave me too".... she heard Tom wail pitifully behind her.

Sobbing she stopped and turned back at the door, keening down the hall. "I love you daddy."

Then she fled. Out of the house. Out of her life. Out of the chaos that was her family, into the biggest rainstorm she could imagine.