~between shelves~ daichixreader

~14~

the door slams behind me, leaving me utterly alone in my now painfully silent room. i cant even get off my knees as the energy from my body has been fully drained. i let the quiet consume me, trying to calm my erratic breathing. i didnt think it would go this way. does he really mean all of that? does he really think im some fake selfish person who never cared?

hours go by and i havent moved from my spot on the floor. at this point the tears had stopped, as i probably drained every last drop by now. i glance at my phone, finally picking it up to read the notifications i had ignored. many of them were just emails and snaps, but one caught my eye:

daisa
Hey! I just got to Tokyo, this place is awesome! How's your day going?

i stare blankly at the text, honestly not knowing how to respond. i feel awful about the tendou situation, but i just cant control the way i feel! if i could, i would have just fallen for tendou. it would have been easier that way.

but i had not. i know i cant control the way i feel, and i feel really good about daichi. we just clicked, and i do really like him. i know i cant just give up on him because of how bad i feel about tendou. i stare at the text a little longer, before impulsively deciding to hit the call button instead.

a few rings go by, each one making me increasingly nervous.

"oh hey y/n! whats up!"

i thought my tears were all dried out, but alas, more fell down my cheeks.

"h-hey daichi."

"wait, whats wrong, are you okay?" concern woven in his tone.

are you okay? god thats the ONE THING that breaks the walls i build up when im sad.

"no-" i squeak out. "i just had this f-fight with tendou. it was about when he saw us yesterday."

he listened to every word i said, even though i was struggling to get them out coherently. i gave him the backstory on our friendship and how i neglected to tell him that i didnt have feelings for him so nothing would change. reliving that sucked ass, but i just had to vent to someone.

the line goes quiet after i finished, him mulling over how to respond.

"y/n. i understand how you feel, and im so sorry you were put in that situation. there were much better ways to deal with it than you did, but im sure you dont really need to hear that as its been thrown at you multiple times already. im also kind of hurt that you kept me a secret from your friends, but i guess its understandable given your situation. i know your not really looking for advice, so ill just stay quiet on that. but look, im still here, okay? i appreciate you trusting me enough to tell me all of this. i wish i could be there for you right now."

ok that was kind of a lot. and now i feel bad that i didnt tell anyone but kasumi about him. god i really am an asshole. i dont even know how to respond to him. hes right, but he still understands where im coming from. thank god i called him.

"im sorry." was all i could think of to say.

"for what?"

"everything. i didnt mean to hide you, i honestly want everyone to know were hanging out because i really like you and enjoy talking to you. i was just so mixed up in this drama that i didnt know how to bring up i was going out with the captain of a different team in the prefecture. thanks for hearing me out though."

"of course. and i like you a lot too, just so you know." i smile for the first time all day.

"i got to go though, ukai is getting us together to talk about tommorow. talk to you later?"

"yeah of course! you guys are gonna do great!"

"thanks, y/n. bye!"

"bye."

i laid in bed, actually happy for once today. i tried to erase tendou's harsh words from my mind and sleep, but the heaviness in my eyes wasnt enough to drift off.

-----

i hear the god awful sound of my alarm blaring me, jolting me awake from the hour of sleep i got. fuck, this day is gonna be terrible. should i just skip? no, it would look so bad! "UGH!" i rub my eyes and force myself out of bed, attempting to get ready for the day.

each class flew by, as i had been praying time would stop so i didnt have to go to the practice gym. math was my last class before i had to go, and i was bouncing my leg furiously and tapping my pencil on the desk.

i feel a hand on my thigh, stopping it from bouncing. "its gonna be fine! dont worry so much, alright?" kasumi whispers to me.

"werent you the one that said they were all gonna hate me though?" i muttered.

she take her hand of me and immediately avoids eye contact, twisting the rings on her hand. "yeah i guess that didnt really help... BUT im sure everything will smooth out somehow?"

"psh, whatever! you were totally right, theyre all gonna side with him. and do i even blame them? no.. kinda? NO! i have to own up to this!"

"glad you know that!" she smirks at me, receiving an eyeroll from me.

the bell rings and i jump in my seat, heartbeat immediately skyrocketing. "girl BREATHE! its only a couple hours! just get through it, okay?" she pats my shoulder and swings her bag to her back, giving me a wink. i sigh "yeah yeah." i lifelessly get up from my seat and trudge to the gym.

i can hear the volleyballs slam into the ground for a distance, sending a jolt up my spine every smack i hear. hope thats not my face when i walk in there.

it was almost worse. i make my way in and everyone turns there head to stare at me, watching me set my bag down near coach. i can barely even glance at them, but i feel all sets of eyes burn into me, especially those firey red ones. "hey! get back to warmups!" coach yells, and they slowly turn their backs on me and continue to warm up. i let out a breath i was holding in and leave to fill up the water bottles.

i get back and try to start handing the bottles out.

"here ya go-"

semi snatches it from the bin, "i got it." he hissed. i was so taken aback, eyes wide in shock. tendou steps in front of me, pushing me to the side and starts handing them out to everyone. all i can do is look at the floor and try to hold back the tears threatening to fall from my eyes. i wish they would have just hit me with the damn ball instead, maybe it would hurt less.

practice was the most excruciating two hours of my life. all i received were nasty stares and cold shoulders. i sat on the bench with my eyes trained on the floor, not saying a word.

it finally ended, and everyone huddled up. except they stood a few feet away from me like i had the fucking plague. i tuned everything out, only for me shaken by coach. "anything you want to add, y/n?"

i peel my eyes from the ground to meet icy cold glares. "um,-"

"we dont need to hear anything from her, lets just get home." gosinki states, eyes boring into mine. "ok." i whisper. a look of confusion flashes across coach's face, but he chooses to ignore the tension. everyones dismissed and i grab my bags to leave. maybe i could just TRY to talk to someone? maybe ushijima would listen? but by the time i turn around, the gym is deserted. everyone had just.. left me there alone. i stood there, engulfed in the newfound quiet of the gym. so she was right. they all hate me.

words: 1388

AN~ hey! um ik this is kinda sad rn LOL but it does get happier i swear i just had to throw some spice at ya👹 lololol