Red Vs Blue season 5 male oc

Got Your Back

Fade in to the spacehip.

Church: What the hell is that tapping noise? Sounds like Morris Code.

Simmons: Morse.

Church: Sheila, if he corrects me again, please make him blow up.

Sheila: Ah huhah, sounds like fun. (trains her turret on them)

Church: Well what does it say?

Grif: It says "tap tap tap." We don't know.

Alex: It's so annoying. You here that Donut shut up with the tapping 

Simmons: We were trying to translate it when you showed up an interrupted us.

Church: No, when I interrupted you, you were standing around doing nothing. Just like the last fifty times I interrupted you guys. Oh wai-wai-wait, listen listen! Listen, it says, "Red... sucks... balls." Hey, look my new ship can talk! And it knows things. That's a good ship.

Simmons: It's not your ship, it's our ship. We called it, and it came.

Alex: Ya now get out.

Church: I don't know, I don't see any markings on it.

Simmons: It landed on Donut!

Sheila: That was fantastic.

Church: How in the heck would that mean- oh wait, the pink guy? Oh, I actually liked him!

Grif: Seriously, what's with all these feelings for Donut?

Alex: That sounds so wrong.

Simmons: You can't have the ship.

Church: I'm not asking for it: it's already mine. Right Sheila?

Sheila: Actually, I kind of like it. I think it is mine.

Church: Hey are you okay?

Simmons: (under his breath) I think there's something wrong with the tank.

Grif: Yeah, I noticed.

Alex: Not that hard to tell.

Simmons: I've got an idea.

Grif: Whoa, okay hold on a second. Before you get too deep in to this, let me remind you that we don't exactly have a good track record when it comes to our plans and that tank.

Simmons: Come on Alex, Grif, I think the tank's malfunctioning.

Grif: Well only one part of it has to function for me to get turned in to a cloud of orange mist.

Alex: Well at least one of us will die.

Church: Okay, just be cool.

Sheila: I am cool. You be cool.

Sarge: Bad news, fellas, I couldn't find that levitation ray, but I did find the remote control to- hey, what's goin' on out here?! Whaddaya think you're doing you lousy Blue?

Church: I'm just trying to figure out what the deal is with this spaceship.

Sarge: Dibs!

Grif Alex and Simmons: Too late.

Sarge: Dangnabbit! Why do I ever leave you two to guard anything? Everybody knows about the International Dibs Protocol! And the No Takebacks Accord.