End Of Passion Play - {James Hetfield/Metallica}

Chapter 23 | Natural Habitat

I didn't have any idea how to deal with the fact that my dad had brain cancer, and knowing I was going to lose him. Slowly, I began cutting myself off from the world.

I hadn't stayed in bed all day since I lost Cliff, and once again, I was beginning to do that.

"Babe, are you really gonna stay in bed a day again?" James asked me one Friday morning.

"Probably." I replied.

He sighed and grabbed my hand, intertwining his fingers with mine. "We're going to Lars' place for a rehearsal tonight. We need a bass player!".

I shrugged. "Take Blair.".

"Well, fine, I'll do that. But do you want to do something with me, Sarah, anything?".

I laughed, but not the way you laugh at something funny. "Do you really want to be around me when I'm like this?" I asked James.

He looked down at me with sad eyes. "Babe, it hurts to see you like this.". He raised my hand up to his lips and kissed it. "I can make you breakfast." he offered.

"No, it's okay." I sighed. "Listen, I'll get out of bed tomorrow, okay?".

Somehow, James convinced me to come to the ocean with him. We drove down to the shore in his truck, bringing along diet Coke and some snacks.

I have to admit, it probably was better than staying in bed all day.

"See, Daisy Duke, I knew you'd like it!" James teased me as I hopped out of the truck, closing my eyes and feeling the hot sun on my body.

I walked along the sand with him and we found a spot to lay down our beach blanket.

"Thanks for taking me, James." I said, laying down and putting on my sunglasses.

"No problem, babe." James replied.

"Sorry I've been so depressing to be around lately.".

"Hey," James said, gently stroking the side of my face. "It's alright, you don't have to apologize. I know how much you love your dad.".

I sighed, moving closer to James. "I wish it could've been my mom. My real mom. She was such a bitch, especially to my dad.".

"I know.".

"I'm glad you never had to meet her. She probably would've hated you.".

James laughed. "Probably.".

"No, seriously, she hated everybody. I wanted to be the opposite of her from a very young age, but now... I think that maybe I was always supposed to end up like her.".

***

James' p.o.v

I put my guitar in its case and carried it out to the living room, where Blair already had her shoes on and was waiting for me.

"You ready, kiddo?" I asked her.

"Yeah!" she nodded, somehow still holding Sarah's heavy bass.

"Okay." I sighed, getting my shoes on. "Goodbye, Sarah! Love you!".

"Bye, you two! Have fun!" Sarah's delayed response came from the bedroom.

Me and Blair walked out to my truck and put our instruments in the back. It had gotten windy since the morning, and dead leaves danced across the street.

"Dad?" Blair asked as we got into the truck.

"Yeah?" I replied.

"Did mom... drink bleach one time?".