End Of Passion Play - {James Hetfield/Metallica}

Chapter 32 | "Write a Biography, Maybe Record a Solo Album"

Sarah's p.o.v

Waking up to a motel room at ten in the morning to heavy rain was depressing. But nothing compared to the heavy feeling of terribly missing James. I knew it would be so easy to run back to him, but I had made up my mind. I grabbed the phone off the nightstand and dialed Kirk's number, knowing he'd be up.

"Hello?" he answered.

"Hey, Kirk." I replied.

"Oh, hi, Sarah. You don't sound too happy.".

"Mhm, I know. Listen, uh, meet me at the airport at one, okay? Bring Lars, too. It's... urgent.".

"The airport? What's going on?".

I bit my lip nervously. "J-j-just meet me there.".

It took a lot to get out of bed, but I did. I wore the same thing from yesterday, as it was one of the only clothing items I took with me.
The suitcase I took wasn't very full at all. I was beginning a new life, and my old one was in the past. Yes, I'd miss it terribly. What me and James had was so great, but I knew I was leaving for the best. I was doing it for him and Blair abd everyone else I loved.

***

I waited at the airport, my gut twisting up. I wanted to break down and cry right there, but I couldn't. It took so much to keep everything in.

I saw a man with curly black hair running up to me, and a shorter, paler, man with him. Kirk and Lars. I smiled through the pain of knowing it would be a hard goodbye.

"Sarah!" Kirk exclaimed.

"Kirk!" I shouted, letting go of my suitcase and throwing my arms around him.

"So, what's going on? Why'd you want us to meet you here?" he asked me, gently rubbing my back. "You're not...".

I sighed, releasing him. "I... I'm leaving. I'm sorry.".

"What?!" Lars shouted. "No, Sarah, you can't! We need you in the band! And... and James, well, he's gonna die without you!".

"Lars, this is gonna benefit all of you, trust me." I said, a huge lump in my throat. "I know it might not seem like it, but it will.".

"No, it won't.". Lars looked at me with this heartbreaking pout on his face.

"I'm sorry." I sighed, looking down.

"Sarah, look, I know I'm not gonna change your mind. I... I just... I'm gonna miss you." Kirk told me. I looked up at him, a tear rolling down my cheek.

"I'm gonna miss you guys, too." I choked out as he wiped it away with his thumb.

"I wish you wouldn't do this to us." Lars sighed.

"It's... it's for the best.".

"What the fock are you even gonna do in New York?".

I shrugged, blinking back tears. "I dunno. Write a biography, maybe record a solo album. You see, my life... I've done everything I've ever wanted to do. And I'm still a mess and I don't see much purpose in myself.".

Kirk's eyes were glassy, and he gazed at me with a longing look. I knew he wanted me to stay. I knew they all did. But I knew I was leaving for the best.

"I love you, Sarah." Kirk told me, wrapping his arms around me.

"I love you, too." I whispered, tears streaming down my face. I held onto him tight, never, ever wanting to let go.

"I love you so much. Stay in touch with me, please. Knowing you're still alive will keep me at peace.".

I took a deep breath, his words bringing me a little bit of comfort. "I promise I will, Kirk." I said. "Thank you for everything.".