I Don't Dance

Miscommunication

It's been two weeks since Cormac and Meredith had their 'date' which in reality consisted of Cormac walking around with Meredith's youngest sleeping on his hip as everyone else ran around outside, Meredith insisting she pay for pizza because we'll he came over and he's holding her not to light child only to get shut down because it's their first date and she cannot pay for the first date. It was cute, the way he was so adamant about paying, it made her feel... cared for us a weird way she hadn't felt in a long time. But that was all then and this is now. She stands by the nurses station signing more discharge papers before she hopefully sneaks away to one of the on call rooms to sleep. It's been a crazy week, none stop work, kids, drama with her sisters boyfriends. She wants sleep, some food, but most of all she really wouldn't mind to just hear the deep Irish accent she seems to crave more lately.

She pulls her scrub cap off as she walks into an on call room. Meredith practically falls onto one of the lower bunks. She wants to sleep. Needs to sleep but every time she closes her eye she sees him. This is worse than a break up she thinks. Life getting in the way of seeing the one person she really wants to see. That sounds wrong too. She would want to see her kids and she does don't get her wrong but Cormac gives her things her kids don't. Not only in an intimate way but in an emotional way too. He is like a safety net for her. She wants to call him, page him just to see him, to hear him say her name but she knows he is busy too. He's had a long week and he has a family of his own. So instead of calling she puts her phone away and forces herself to close her eyes, wether or not she actually sleeps.

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He thinks he can smell her, her hair, her perfume, her as he walks through the hallway. He has to be insane because she's not here. She's probably at home hugging her kids and sleeping, like he should be but he can't sleep. Surly he'd done something wrong because he hasn't heard from Meredith grey since their date and he thought it went well. After all he held Ellis pretty mush the whole time. Maybe he over stepped, but he just makes her so damn nervous sometimes. Cormac had had no clue what to do or think and he wanted to be as open as possible but clearly that wasn't want Meredith was looking for.

He shook his head as he pushed the door open to the on call room, pleasantly surprised to see Meredith with her back to him looking over her shoulder at him. He froze half way through the door not know what to do or say. Not know if he should sprint the opposite direction, or fall to his knees and beg for forgiveness. Either way he froze. Meredith turned, swinging her legs so she could stand up in front of him now.

"Hi." It was whispered, small, tired, and clearly hurt. Furrowing and brow he took a step forward, closer to Meredith yet keeping distance. As the door closed the sliver of light it casted hit Meredith perfectly making her tired eyes sparkle. He swore he could have fallen to his knees right there and then. The sparkle of the sage orbs brought him right back to the night of Maggie's wedding, to them dancing in the grass, the sun setting around them, everyone there but so far it felt as if it was just them. What he would give to be back there. To start this over so he didn't fell as he does now.

"Hi" he finally pushes out through dry, chapped lips. He sidesteps her, it hurts. Deep down, to walk away even though all he really did was turn his back it had a much stronger meaning. He hears her intake of breath, hears the small sound that comes from the back of her throat. A sound that sounds vaguely like the start of a sob. He turns then realizing he has just hurt her. Pain strikes his chest, he never wants that. Never wants to see her hurt, upset, especially not because of him.

When is azure irises, meet her green she sees a single tear slide down her cheek. "Mer... what'd I do? Why haven't you talked to me?" He asks genuinely curious. She shakes her head trying to bring herself back together to answer.

"I wanted too, Cor I really did." He smirks at the nickname 'Cor' he thinks it's the first time she's used it, if not it's definitely one of the firsts and he loves it. It give him all those good butterflies. The kind that makes him want to scoop her up and hold her all night long.

"I just- I've been working, the kids... please know I wasn't ignoring you." She's practically begging and she feels pathetic. She's never been like this. Well she has with Derek and the whole 'so here it is your choice; it's simple her or me. And I'm sure she's really great but derek I love you in a really really big- pretend to like your taste in music, let you eat the last piece of cheese cake, hold a radio over my head outside your window, unfortunate way that makes me hate you love  you so pick me choose me love me.'  Thing but this was a little different. Right now she's not completing with another woman, right now she is kicking herself in the ass for not sending a simple text.

Now he feels like an ass for not thinking. Of course, if he got called in she probably did too and she had said she had a good time. Why was he over thinking this so much?

Stepping into her personal space now he puts a hand on her arm.

"Meredith hunny, I'm so sorry. I didn't even think about you working. C'mere." And with that she collapses into him. Her head hurried in his neck, his hands slowly running up and down her back, his lips press to her temple.

"I couldn't sleep." She whispers, her breath hitting his neck sending a shock down his spine, causing goosebumps to prickle his skin. "Lemme hold you."

AUTHORS NOTE:
I am so proud of myself right now for writing this so quick, this being said I have not proofread and I'm sorry!!! More to come bc this is a good place to start again. Enjoy!