Frozen pages (Chongqiu/Xingyun) ||Hiatus||

Chapter 28: Memories

    Xingqiu didn't sleep well at all, his dream was about Chongyun, as he realized that they won't be together for a good while, his teary eyes his disappointed expression, his hurt voice. And in the end, he was angry at the navy boy.

He woke up, tears in his eyes as he took in his surroundings, he had to be with Xiangling for the banquet, and he was supposed to be with her beforehand as well, he didn't want this. Yes Xiangling was his friend but he rather be with his boyfriend,.
If only it was that easy.

     He couldn't help but think back to the picture, that day in the park, it happened a few days after they got together, Xingqiu was telling all kinds of stories to Chongyun about the two of them to help him gain more of his memories back about it all. It was magical, just the two of them.
Or so they thought.
Somebody was following them and took the picture.

He wanted to find out who he is, but he couldn't just yet. And he doesn't know how to face Chongyun. He has to act everywhere now with Xiangling. And he wasn't allowed to text him about it or anything. The only option was the banquet but, he didn't know how to go about it.

    'Hey I have to marry Xiangling sorry see you in a year' or what.

That won't work, he has to just, try to avoid him untill Chongyun doesn't care about him anymore. That would be better, if he knew that Chongyun doesn't love him anymore, if he found someone else. At least he wouldn't have any reasons to be afraid of this whole marriage, he wouldn't have anyone to go back to after a year, and he wouldn't have anyone who could be harmed if they meet in secret.

But that was easier said than done, he knew how much he loved Chongyun, and how much Chongyun loved him.
And that made it way more difficult, he didn't want to break his boyfriend's heart. But maybe if he did he will be safe from his damn father. And maybe move on after a while. Then at least one of them would be happy.

    He also felt bad for Hu Tao, she will be arguably more heartbroken than Chongyun, her and Xiangling even had plans to get married as soon as they get the chance to move out. But all of that is the gutter now because of Xingqiu's father approaching Mr. Mao about a business marriage. Who obviously didn't know of his daughter's plans because she was scared he won't accept her.

-A week later-

    He has to propose. Today. To Xiangling. And they have to act all happy amd extatic about it.

Him and Chongyun didn't talk after the banquet, his last memory was a bouquet of flowers left on the ground of the corridor, it was the one his boyfr-, his ex-classmate had in his hands back at the entrance. Xingqiu knew damn well those flowers would've ended up in his hands, and not on the ground. He knew damn well and it hurt him a lot. He picked them up and brought them home, trying to nurture the ones that didn't break. They are still in his room right now, serving as a reminder, of who he loves. He was hoping to get at least one seed from them so he can plant it and keep those flowers forever.

     A call of his name made him jolt out of his thoughts and hurriedly put on the clothes he was supposed to wear for the proposal before going down to his father who was waiting at the door next to the driver.
His father gave him a smal smile. He was proud now huh. But he'll never be proud for who is son actually is. Only for the controlled "well behaved" idiot that he wants to see.

The proposal went smoothly, Xiangling even cried "from happiness". They both knew it was a heartbroken cry that she played off as happiness. It was hard for Xingqiu to nit start sobbing as well. Then they went out on a date together as per his father's orders. Then he took her out to an amusement park and blah blah blah. Basically the only goal here was to make them seem the happiest and best couple in the world, and if they are so happy surely the company they are working for is worth investing in right?. The media was full of them.

    -Childhood friends to lovers, the beautiful and talented Xiangling Mao from Wanmin restaurant and the ever so perfect Xingqiu Guhua from the Feiyum Commerce Company!

Their wedding is sadly postponed to next year but alas they said it will be the most magical of all!
Many will be invited and the general public will be able to watch through the screens as this dreamy couple vow themselves to one another!

Stay tuned as from now on there will be a monthly interview program in our channel where we ask all kinds of questions from the pair that you! Yes you! The audience can ask them about! So make sure to follow our facebook page and leave questions for them under the monthly posts we will put out! This month's interview will start next week Friday so make sure to not miss it! You can find all the Detailed information at www.facebook.com/companynews!-

    The TV was turned off.
Chongyun hugged his pillow tightly, trying to not start sobbing again. His eyes red, dark bags under it, his face pale, his body numb and thinner than last week. He was barely able to eat, and when he did he'd throw it all back out half an hour later. He kept getting nightmares and he started wishing that he never woke up form that stupid coma months ago..

His parents were worried, well, why wouldn't they be. He didn't eat, didn't sleep snd he stayed in his room all day, all they could hear were the quiet sobs and sniffles through the door.

He knew that he should move on, he knew that just a few months ago he remembered nothing about the boy in those news. But now.. He remembered every single thing.

He wanted to just disappear, cut everything out, just stop existing forever. Xingqiu was with him ever since elementary.
They knew each other the best. From favourite color through the weirdest habits till the darkest secrets.
Losing him was like losing a part of him. But now he lost him, forever. And he cannot do anything about it.

    He looked at his old drum set from middle school. He used to play the drums for a while. He liked it and Xingqiu always asked him to play back then. Then they just kinda forgot abt it as Chongyun lost interest in it.
Music was a form of escape still though, especially lately. He listen to tons of songs and even searched up his old CDs to and listened to old albums he loved. Binged through the internet for new songs and new preformers.

It helped him, immensed him in somebody else's world and life, made him feel like none of his problems existed.
He wanted to get back to playing the drums, but what was the point when the only audience he used to have is now gone too?. What's the point if he hadn't played in ages and his rythm sense is probably very distorted now.

So he just closed his eyes, putting on his headphones and falling asleep to the music. His first well rested nap finally came, maybe music really is the cure out of this.

After a week of torture he could have a few hours of good rest.