"if i asked you to take me somewhere without asking why and where would you ? "
" is it going to get me killed ?" jessies voice comes out soft fallowed by a yawn ....i most likly should have waited until more later to call seeing as its only 6:00 am .
"it wont scouts honor " i reply
" you were never a-"
"shut up will you help me or not " i cut her off while rolling my eyes fully aware she cant see me .
" ill pick you up in 20"
i smile and hang up . looking at myself one last time in the mirror i take a deep breath . lets hope alex isnt going to kill me for this .
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" okay i understand how this can be bad ...but i was honestly expecting worse when you called ." jessie says looking back and forth from my current state "alex is not going to like this at all " i shake my head and cringe
" yeah i probably should have thought this over more " i focus back to jess and less on the ink going into my skin "i need this though jess i really do , i cant keep pushing down all this pain i have in me , i need to face it ...this is how im facing it ."
she sighs but nods her head in understanding " i remember my first one ..it hurt alot but i couldnt have been more happy with it , now it carries so much meaning for me . so i understand , i just hope this helps you and doesnt make things worse . " i hum turning to look at the tattoo on my arm as my artist finishes , two doves side by side flying above a fallen angel .....i know im broken but i cant let it take away from who i was...who i still am . my mom ...grams ...theyre both still with me ,i need to stop looking and start feeling . so i may rise from my fallen state . i must relearn my worth , things need to change . i need to change , not change who i am but change how i see myself as , im not worthless like my father says i am .
" trust me jessie ....i need to see things for how they are , theyre gone from this life but that doesnt mean that their spirits arent still here to guide me ....to love me . " i pay the tattoo artist and make sure to leave a tip for taking me in so damn early in the morning and me and jess make our way back to the rooms . as we are walking down the street something catches my eyes or rather someone
"Is that your ex" jessie says as we both stop walking
" what no we never dated stupid " i turn and look at her like shes dumb .
" really cause i swear you both have this far off longing look and- " i elbow her in the gut stopping her mid may and turn and smile as said someone comes up to us .
" smiley? what the hell are you doing out so early in the morning " i smile at jessica and attempt to hide my arm behind my back .
" oh us you know just....talking a walk? how about you " i let my eyes roam over her obivous running outfit .....god damn i totally have a type . has she always been this ...defined ..... shit j focus . i look up and meet her eyes , shes smirking at me and i gulp having beem caught checking her out .
" why are you hiding you arm "she asks smugly and i roll my eyes groaning as i pull my arm out from my back .
" please keep this to yourself love " she slowly movers closer and looks at my arm" im afraid alex wont be to happy about this but i needed it for me you know ?"
" im sure your mother and grams would have loved it " jessica smiles at me then steps back " i gotta finish my run but dont be a stranger alright ? ill be in the stands for sundays game ...find me after you win "
" what happens if you lose ? " i smirk at her and she shakes her head
" hmmm taking a winner home sounds better but ill accept it .....give you at least a small win " she kisses my cheek before running off , holy shit when did she get so confident .
" wow youre such a bottom .." i glare at jess and smack the back of her head " ow wtf ! "
" now you know how it feels "
i know i have a long way to go but i feel it .. things are going to get better , im going to get better , for mom , for grams ....for me .
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Short little updated , im sorry it took forever for one but please know i have not forgotten this story
please leave me your fed back and how you guys are wanting the stroy to go , are you liking the idea of jordans new love intrest ?
note that this chapter has not been edited . so i apologize for any mistakes in spelling exc.
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chasing dreams
AdventureJordan rosewood never had a easy life most of it was full of pain ,her mother died when she was 8 leaving jordan with her abusive father ,at the age of 12 being put into a orphanage , only family member felt was her grandmother who was to sick to l...
