Can You Hear the Ocean?

Chapter 32

Under the glow of her lamplight, Mia sat at her desk and watched as her college friends laughed and shared stories with each other about their lives on the computer screen. She weakly smiled back at them and drew her knees close to her as she sat in her rickety office chair. She had been laughing with them the last time they had spoken, but tonight, she mainly remained quiet, envious of their joy.

But I chose this, Mia reminded herself. She'd made up with Julian, distanced herself from Leila, stopped attending her artist groups, all for the sake of not getting attached. And soon enough, with a little professional luck, she'd be back in New York with her friends, and her time in Maine could just remain a brief dream.

"Mia, how's life going for you?" Phoenix asked.

Mia blinked, remembering suddenly she was a part of the conversation.

"It's been good," she lied. 

She clutched her knees slightly closer to her body, wondering when she had begun lying to her college friends. They were always so honest with each other when they were attending school together; albeit Mia didn't like speaking about her time in Missouri much. Only a few years prior, she would've told them all about how she and Julian had nearly broke up, how there was unspoken tension between her and Leila, but she stayed silent.

"You said you were taking art classes? How are those going?" June wondered.

Once again, Mia lied. "They're good. I haven't been in a few weeks. Just been busy with work. I'll go back soon."

"Maine must be beautiful this time of year," Phoenix said.

"I guess so," Mia said. "The leaves must be changing in New York, too."

"The kids I'm teaching like to give me some leaves as gifts during recess," Alana said. "It's absolutely adorable! Although I'm never really sure what to do with them afterwards."

Mia smiled slightly.

"How are things living with Leila?" June asked.

"Same old," Mia replied. "She hasn't kicked me out, so that's good, right? Although her cat still won't let me pet him."

"The tragedy," Phoenix remarked. She noticed their cat in frame, sleeping peacefully on the sofa behind them.

"I don't mind much," Mia said. She'd never grown up with pets to begin with. If Fuji didn't like her, so be it.

"And you and Julian?" Alana asked.

Mia opened her mouth, once again debating if she should tell them, but at the last minute, she changed her mind. "Good as always," she lied.

"You don't have much to say today," Phoenix noted.

"Sorry. Worked a double shift. I'm tired," Mia said. Beside her, her phone began to buzz. There was only one person it could be. When she looked down, she saw Julian's name flashing on the screen. A part of her wanted to silence it, but she was afraid the more she talked to her friends, the more they would discover something wasn't quite right with her.

"Sorry. I have to go a little early. Julian's calling," Mia said.

"Aw, well, we'll talk again soon," Alana said.

"See you, Mia," both June and Phoenix said.

She quickly closed her computer and answered her phone. "Hey, what's up?" she asked.

"I just wanted to talk to you," Julian said.

"I told you I was talking to my friends tonight, didn't I?" Mia asked.

"Oh. Was that tonight? Sorry. You want me to call back?" Julian asked.

Mia looked at her shut computer and sighed. "No. It's fine," she murmured. Though she wanted to do nothing more than curl up in bed and sleep, she remained on the phone with Julian for two hours, listening to him rant about nonsensical work-related stories and his various fights with his parents. She twirled a strand of hair around her finger as she listened.